][。叹息。][

][。叹息。][

最近总会莫名的叹息。
总会突然之间感觉很彷徨，很累。
感谢出现在我生命中的好友。

其实人与人之间的感情真的蛮难维系的。
很多独处的时刻，
我都会在想你过的好吗？
但却又不懂该如何谓问你。

许多时后，拿起手机后又选择放下。
很想问候你，却又觉得随着时间的流失，
我们的距离仿佛远了。
比起从前，现在的我们真的疏远了吧。

记得我们曾经说过的。
我想这就是我们当初所说的疏远吧。
我不知道自己究竟为何倔强。。
或许是我对一些人的要求太高了吧。

好啦，发泄完毕。
想对这几位特别的人说声谢谢.

wen: xie xie ni! although u always beat mi n bully mi n say i fat n still say u v nice to mi..i still wanna say thank you to u! thanks for letting mi stay over n study at ur hse..thou we nv realli study dao =P but e food realli made mi..happy n FAT! haha thanks u lame shit!thanks for always knowing how i feel..thanks for saying tt u understand..but nxt time pls beat my left hand =P

jing: xie xie ni! haha thanks for everything..thanks for letting mi noe tt i m nt alone..i m realli glad for more than words can say..n dun worry..wad u missed out on for e past yrs..i guess we r getting it bac nw =]

forever5: 13179

llz: xie xie ni! thanks for allowing mi to rant! thanks for always being dere to lend a listening ear! =D pls take care!! wear goggles! cya!

end here le..take gd care every1! byee..

][.10.fe.15.][
][.too many maybe(s).][

][.if onli i culd.][

][.if onli i culd.][

it rained e whole day.
n i stayed hm e whole day for e 1st official day of e study break.
jus another day.
nt till i flipped thur my photo album.
n this thought jus came thur my mind..
if onli i culd..
yes wen..u r right..i care..

if onli i culd..
i realli wanna go bac to e past..
i wanna erase everything..
i wuld nv ever ever wanna get to noe this person..

if onli i culd..
i wuld nv wanna things to turn out this way..
sighs..

if onli i can turn e time bac to 3-4 yrs ago..
i wuld make sure tt i nv knew e existence of this person..

i nv told any1..
but yes..
u nv noe how much i dread myself for causing all these now..
n i looked at e pics..
n i hoped tt those moments nv happened..
if burning those pics n moments wuld change e situation nw..
i wuld..=]

while thinking abt all these..
another random thought came out..
n yeah..
we r jus too "busy" to even drop by to say hi to one another yah..
sighs..
how things change w time..
i hate these..

but thankfully..
there're special things n affinity tt dun..
thanks for all these special ones..=]
我把最珍贵的回忆深深的埋藏在心底的最深处。
把最灿烂和纯真的照片好好的放在皮夹里。
把最珍惜的这段友情紧握在手心里。
然后默默的祈祷，让这一切永远如此吧。

hao la..take gd care every1!
bye..

][.10.fe.15.][
][.13179.][

][.peak.][

][.peak.][

if dere's sumthing known as guardian angel..
wuld he/she appear right now?
sighs..
pressure n stress wuld nv reach an all time high till e time is running out..
tml is my 1st prelims paper = gp =]
not realli anticipating it..
neither m i prepared for it..
but..
jus nd to blog n vent off sum of e stress =X

gd thing for e day was meeting fungi on e bus n hafing both breakfast n dinner w my dearest family =]

tt realli made my day better apart from drowning myself in gp at Mc cafe at downtown n mus thank tricia for e subway cookie! =] i m realli thankful tt tml is gp n nt any other subject..if nt i wuld jus col (cry out loud)..n reading articles r realli fun n nice esp when there r many funny facts n things gg ard in e world eg in Dahomey, a girl is most attractive if she is fat =P ..but trying to haf my own opinion regarding capital punishment etc realli got mi into lots of thinking n headache =X
so at e end of e day..realli felt saturated..n dere's so much more tt i haven read thur..sighs..

haha alrite..i can foresee tt my 2 wks starting frm tml wuld be super iNtErEsTiNg w studying plans tt i had nv ever endured be4..but i shall try to enjoy it =P..

all by myself..tt's exactly how i feel now..
still remembered tt it was a yr ago when we were at e pasar malam hafing durian e day be4 u guys de gp..n now..
it's my turn..
all by myself..
jus gotta be strong n pull thur this!

jia u every1! take gd care n press on! =]

][.10.fe.15.][
][.be strong.][

][.dark.][

][.dark.][


if life was a graph.
i m at e min pt now.
slapped hard in e face by reality.
all along i was e 1 daydreaming.
its time to wake up n give my best.
jus do it!

][.10.fe.15.][
][.lifetime friend.][
][.tt's wad we shall be.][

][.mix n match.][

][.mix and match.][

everything happen for a reason.
if dere's sumthing unhappy,
sumthing happy wuld cum along to neutralise it =]

jia u every1!
everything will be over soon.
hang in dere..
n stars r realli beautiful.
scenery nv fails to make my day =]

end here le..
take gd care every1!
bye..

p/s: mug like a mug..lol jing XP
][.10.fe.15.][
][.if onli.][

][.Secret.][

][.Secret.][

today is another slacked day.
met llz in e noon for maths n super gd happy buys!
went to watched Secret w forever5 after that.
haha thou fungi nv join us for movie.
but she was nice enff to wait for e movie to end n go dinner tgt w us =]

haha e movie is quite nice.
it's been quite long since i watched movies tt i like le.
i mean.
my type of movie =]

haha aw that movie made mi tot a little.
n i asked jing, what wuld she wan if she was given a chance to go bac to e past?
e ans touched mi.
as for mine?
haha it's bu neng shuo de mi mi. =P

aw..i asked fungi e same qn too.
n i tink her ans was v gd n true too. =]
everything is gd as it is now.

there's no backspace in life.
if life was a keyboard, we wuld onli enter n go forward.
no backwards n backspace.
n jus as i haf always believed.
everything happened for a reason.
wadever tt is now.
jus let it be.
wadever tt is gone n lost.
jus let it be.

jus wanna say.
i m v thankful for all that i haf now =]

hao la..end here le..take gd care every1! byee..

][.10.fe.15.][
][.enter.][

][.time flies.][

][.time flies.][

i m guilty.
guilty for not doing revision n lazing ard online.
but be4 i go.
jus wanna blog a little.

jus read Times regarding how Princess Diana transformed Britain.
n there's onli 1 thing i can say.
admirable.

10 yrs bac when i was 8.
i remember vividly that i stood by the tv and witness her funeral.
it was so sad.
it was so sad even thou i knew nothing much abt her then.

now, as i look back..
i understand why was Britain's customary stoicism overwhelmed by raw, unbridled grief.
sumthing in particular caught my attention when i was reading it.
there was once Princess Diana visited a center for the blind.
n there was this person weeping.
Princes Diana asked him why..n he said 'I can't see you.'
So she took his hand and put it on her face.

she is really admirable.
n dere was this comment in e article.
By dying young, Diana ensured her immortality. Better dead than wrinkled.
hmm..do u agree with it? =]

yups..i noe that's quite random..but haha jus tot of how i stood by e tv n teared 10 yrs bac..n wow..time realli flies..=]

watched bao jia wei guo n laughed..it's realli my onli joy for e day nw =P too bad it's ending on mon..haha aw decided to pick up e phone n phone e great old lame shit..haha dunno why e sudden choice..but i guess that's jus instinct ba..n i wuld nv forget an email that i once read..
"There's no need for a reason to call and chat with a friend" thanks for everything lame shit! =]

n haha..suddenly jus wanna say..i hope all of u are still doing well! (to those tt i haven met for sum time =]) n llz..thanks for ur help! haha

end here le..take gd care every1! byee..

][.10.fe.15.][
][.friends for life.][

][.自己.][

][.自己.][

有好多好多的话想对你说。

但最终却没说出口。

如果要我从今天拍的照片中选出最能表达我的心情的，

应该就是。。

一个人生活..独立或孤独?

][.10.fe.15.][

][.speechless.][

][.speechless.][

are there moments whereby u feel so tired n speechless?
not exactly unhappy but jus dun feel like talking?
if dere's a moment like that..
i guess tt's how i m feeling nw ba..
jus wanna talk to e great old pal..

take gd care every1..byee..

][.10.fe.15.][
][.status: stoning.][

][.belief.][

][.belief.][

took quite a lot of random shots today..

thought abt quite a few things today..

today is jus another day spent nt studying..

but today is yet another special day..

e 1st thing i saw as i stepped out of my hse..isn't it beautiful? =]

sum random pics tt i took on e way to e 36's bus stop =]

e yummy munchy doughnuts tt sh brought mi to buy =P n doughtnuts shop r like springing out everywhere nw =P

haha so yups..tt's jus sum pics tt i took today n realli like it..=] i realli love taking pics..esp scenery..n in e process..i learned sumthing..if u wanna do sumthing..jus do it! there's no time for any 2nd thoughts..cz..e moment tt u hesitate etc..e sun might had set, e clouds might haf shifted..n e moment tt u wanna capture down is gone..n u will nv find it bac again..so..jus do it! wadever u wanna do..dun hesitate! =]

n yups..another thing tt i felt today is..u realli cannot ignore e wonders of fate..sumthings r jus not meant to be..believe mi..every1 wish to feel loved..n cared..no1 like the feeling of being neglected n taken for granted..so pls nv ever take things for granted..ppl dun haf to do e things tt they do for u..=] so if possible..say thanks n let ur friend noe how grateful u r to em..=]

n indeed i m realli v grateful..wasn't feeling exactly wonderful ytr..but after e chat w my bestest friend..i realli felt so much better..like yes..sum1 understand how i feel..like yar..tt's exactly how i feel..thanks so much for listening..thanks so much for everything..i m realli grateful tt i found u n of cz forever5..n thou u always say we can't live without u..n we always say u v bhb..but tt's v true =] thanks heaven for letting u be in my life =] n pls take gd care of yaself!

another thought tt i had was..it takes 2 hands to clap..that holds even in friendship..if 1 hand always take e other for granted n throw temper at e other frequently..how do u tink e other hand wuld feel? many a times i felt tt i wuld nv give up n nv allow this hand to get hurt..but nw..after so many things tt had happened recently..i tink it's realli fate..maybe sum ppl jus can't be friends forever..n i wuld leave it to fate..maybe it's becoz i had been spoilt by e others n hence sumtimes i jus can't accept e way u treat mi..cz tt's nt e friendship tt i had been exposed to..maybe its mi..maybe its u..maybe its jus tt they r too gd..i dunno..wadever it is..if one day i ever walk away from u..n i noe tt u wun do anything to stop everything..i jus wanna say..thanks for letting mi learn n grow..n thanks for e short n sweet memories..for now..i wuld jus let everything cont..but from today..i wuld nv allow myself to be hurt by everything anymore..=]

hao la..end here le..take gd care every1! byee..n c..tt's always e case when i cum hm early..= nt doing work! sighs..

][.10.fe.15.][

][.learn to cherish be4 u wanna be cherished.][

][.think.][

][.think.][

hmm..e 5days nat break is gg to be over soon..n it's so depressing!
sighs..aw these 5 days ain't too bad..
haha slacked n rest for 1 day =P
spent a fruitful day w forever5 =]
spent 2 days coping myself up at e fav corner of pasir ris lib =]
n spent e last day w trng n w a tinge of nostalgia =]

hmm realli v glad n thankful for many things in my life..realli..was talking to mummy today..n felt realli v fortunate to haf forever5 w mi..thou sumthings change regarding my relationship w one of em..but it makes mi cherish e friendship even more..(ahem nt tt i dun in e past ;p) but yah..jus feel tt we can't take certain things for granted..=] i love u guys! thanks for everything that u guys had d0ne for e decade =] e times tt we spent tgt are always so relaxed n filled w joy..e moments when u wuld do stupid things and act like a 8 yr old when u r already 18 =P these r e kind of things tt i wuld nv haf e chance to do w e others..this is wad made em always so special =] lifetime friends..thats wad we wuld be =D

apart from em..there's still others tt u met as u grew..those tt guided u n were dere for u..realli thankful for all of em too..1031,llz,employer,ah rum..w special thanks to 1031 n llz..to 1031..thou ur temper is realli quite bad..but thanks for tolerating my bad temper too =P..haha thanks for everything tt u had done for mi =]..n to llz..u r e onli gd thing tt happened in u18..thanks for always knowing e right words n always being dere to give mi e con-fe-dence to fight on! thanks so so so much =] realli thankful to these ppl for guiding mi..=]

also v thanful to all those friends tt i haf met then n now..ahs, vj and alj.kem basketball team mates n friends! as well as concourse kids! thanks for being in my life =]

hmm haha i din start of thinking tt i wanna post n blog abt all these..but my hand went across e keyboard n these words of thanks jus appeared on e screen..haha realli thanks so much to every1 for everything..=]

aw..yah..was talking abt e 5 days hols..hmm today's trng n ytr's 9 mins jog realli made mi feel that sumtimes realli li bu chong xin..it's nt tt u dun wan to..its jus tt ur actions can't coordinate w ur mind..it's been so long tt i jogged n played basketball..n for a split sec..i tot..maybe i wun wanna play anymore..haha tt's jus for a split sec..but no1 wuld noes wad wuld happen in e future..cz if not for forever5..i wuld nt haf joined tt game..=]

n i took out my ruan n played a few songs..haha missed those days which i practice hard for syf too..maybe i wuld pick it up again afterAs ba..=]

n haha..sumtimes dun we jus miss so so so much n get so so so tired over sumthings..if dere is such a moment..i m feeling such nw..a sense of nostalgia n lost..n sumtimes i mus admit tt i love isolation too..being alone n think abt stuffs..haha every1 need a moment alone isn't it? if u nv haf..try to haf a moment all to urself ba =]

hao la..end here le..n if u r nt feeling too happy nw..listen to ->living next door to alice by smokie ba..haha nowadays whenever i feel v tired n stone..i wuld listen to tt song n e catchy tempo wuld make u nod n shake for a few moments like an idiot..haha jkjk..quite nice..listen to it ba =] (it got sad lyrics thou =P)

take gd care every1! byee...

][.10.fe.15.][
][.a promise is a promise.][
][.we wuld go for another celebration.][

][.finally.][

][.finally.][

一切总算到了一段落。
回到了过去。
我只能说，谢谢老天给我的一切。=]

当梦想与现实遇到彼此时，
你会选择哪一个呢？
勇敢追随梦想。。
还是放弃梦想，踏实的面对现实呢?

take gd care every1! byee..

][.10.fe.15.][

][.food.][

][.food.][

haha food nv fails to make my day!

this yr's celebration was realli diff from all e others..love e food!

but i miss e sing along sessions in sec sch..n e days in pri sch when u dress up for e occasion XP..

haha realli do..

but here's sum pics for memo..(been posting quite lots of pics nowadays..cz..haha dunno XP)

haha e lame n quite cool de "opening ceremony" =D

that's e satays! =D

haha that's e prata! (mamajan i was taking e food..nt u! haha so cannot kill me =P)

haha my hand! e last time i made this was during either sec2 or sec4's racial harmony =P

hmm today is quite a gd day?..haha i dunno..everyday is a mixture nw..=]

Will I always be there for you

When the tears get near your eyes

Will I be the one that's by your side

Will I be there when you call me in the middle of the night

Will i keep the rain from fallin down into your life

I promise, I promise I promise I will

Take your darkest night

And make it bright for you

Will I be there to make you strong

And to lean on

When this world has turned so cold

Will I be the one that's there to hold

i used to made a promise to protect all those tt matters to mi..

but it seems like i failed this time..sorry

hao la..end here le..take gd care every1! byee..looking forward to tml =]

][.10.fe.15.][

][.every song reminds mi of everything.][

][.journey.][

][.journey.][

life is a journey.

w diff memories at diff pt of time.

went bac to pasir ris pri to watch sing s'pore today.

n wow..dun we miss e times?..

haha i can't deny how much i can't help but drift into so many diff memories..

pri sch..

sec sch..

jc1..

n i can't stop e pain..

but thankful enff..there's also sumthing to make my day =]

monkey w yummy! this realli made my day =]

glow for me..wuld u?..i seems ok..but it's nt ok at all..sighs..

][.10.fe.15.][

][.i dun even noe why i do e things i do.][

][.thanks.][

][.thanks.][

thanks for listening.
thanks for accepting.
thanks for everything.

take gd care every1! byee..n if u haf mi lu bing's -> shi ying..do send mi! thanks lots =]

][.10.fe.15.][

][.stone.][

][.stone.][

listened to e same song over n over again..
hybernate at e library right after sch..
every moment tt i m not doing work..
i wuld recall abt e harsh words tt i said to u..
i wuld regret it..
sighs..
it's been so long since we realli talked..
ytr was e day..
n yet i ruin it..
i m sorry..
i realli m..
i realli wanna let u rant abt all e probs tt u faced in work recently..
but..
i dunno wad went wrong w mi..
was realli angry tt u made mi wait for nth..
realli was..n hence threw my temper..
cz i believe u wuld too..
haiz..if onli i held it bac as always..
is dis revenge?..
heaven's punishment to me for treating sum1 else this way?..
i guess it is...
n it hurts..
but wad shuld i do?..
i dunno..
i realli dunno wad to say..
jus let me stone..=[

n once again..thanks llz..e random msges despite u being so tired is realli appreciated..=] as always..u made mi smile at e hp after stoning at it for so long..hoping for a impossible reply..=

hao la..end here le..take gd care every1! byee..

][.10.fe.15.][
][.n a tear fell.][

][.thanks.][

][.thanks.][

jus wanna say thanks to sum1 special =]
thanks for always being dere.
thanks for always knowing e right words to comfort mi.
thanks for giving mi e constant boost of con-fe-dence.
thanks so much for everything. =]

as u embark on ur new journey.
i jus wanna say.
jia u and all e best!
take care old pig! =P

spent my whole day brooding n stoning over it.
guessed its time to get on w my work.
i m sorry.
tc.

][.10.fe.15.][
][.fate.][

][.fool.][

][.fool.][

maybe it's e pressure.
maybe it's mi being emo.
maybe.

but i jus can't stop e tears.
tml is econs test.
but i haf no mood for it at all.

i feel like a fool.
throwing temper at u.
den apologising to u for it.

i realli feel like a fool.
why do i always try to salvage e situation after worsening it.

switched off my hp.
cz i tink i m realli tired.
tired of myself being such a fool.

hate myself for being so bad tempered.
why.
hate it.

n mi lu bing's songs are so sad.
v suited for nw.

i need to stop being a fool.
no more tears.

take gd care every1!
bye.

][.10.fe.15.][
][.这些眼泪我无所谓.][

][.alone.][

][.alone.][

nw i wanna shut my hp n try to shut myself from e world.
but i can't.
maybe i shuld soon.

can't get e thoughts arranged properly.
e last thing tt i ever wanna is to hurt em.
how much i hope tt sumthings had never ever happened.
so that it wun hurt so much nw.

end here le.
take gd care every1!
bye.

][.10.fe.15.][

][。独处。][

][。独处。][

有时对着这世界，
对这人世间的种种，
真得很累。

独处的时光相反的更轻松。
让思绪冷静下来，
让心情平复，
好好的享受那瞬间的平静。

现在的我，
只希望能有力量熬过这一切。
只希望我在乎的人都快乐。
只希望守候天使会出现。
只希望你会在这时候出现。

真的怀念过往的一切。
真的。

][.10.fe.15.][

][.serious.][

][.serious.][

for e past wks..it has been ASSays after ASSays..sbqs after sbqs..no time to think abt lots of things..onli stress here n dere n frustrations at being unable to start on my revision etc etc..

however for today..no work on my mind..jus wanna sort out my thoughts n ask myself wad i realli wan in my life..=]

haha went for career fair..hmm it was jus a yr ago when they were still ard n dragged us along telling us to start planning..however..apart from lol-ing at em n getting freebies..i did not tot much..haha tot abt taking up journalism's scholarship thou..that's like e onli thing tt i gave serious thoughts about?..haha

aw went for career fair again today..went for moe's talk..den caas talk..n walked ard n get e stuffs..haha matong say we went "shopping"..lol..aw hmm e moe talk did realli made mi feel like getting out of my comfort zone to be a teacher..den e jornalism scholarship tt i had been thinking abt..haha this n that..actually top3 tt i realli considered n wanna is..teaching? journalism? social work?..

but..on e way bac hm n up till now as i flip thur e brochures etc etc..i tink..i realli wanna be..wanna be a social worker..haha..hmm i hope i can make it la..=] shall let e blog note down my dream =P

ok..end here le! take gd care every1! byee..

][.10.fe.15.][
][.i tink tt's wad i wanna be.][