][.i can't stop it.][

][.i can't stop it.][

after so many days of telling myself that if i m unhappy,
that's only my own fault,
there's no1 i can blame.

if i m sad,
that's my own fault,
becoz it's me who allow myself to be sad.

but at this v moment,
i can't take it anymore,
n tears fell.

i feel like my communication system is breaking down.
why is it that whatever msg that i wanna convey,
it would always end up e other way?

2 person that matters to mi,
n yet when i try to get e msg across,
i jus failed,
n e wrong idea is given.

both of the cards to em lay there lying in my files for days.
to e 1st one,
my heart sank, n i tink it's time to give up after ur persistent refusal to reply.
it's not ya fault,
i noe it's mine.
i noe it's becoz of my words.
i knew that it was gg to hurt to lose a friend in you.
i knew that u wuld nv be e 1 to salvage.
however, this is e 1st time tt u refuse to respond no matter how i try to salvage.
maybe that's e best way out.
many moments when my thoughts drift away,
when memories appear, i wuld jus stone for a moment.
i do regret.
but maybe that's meant to be.
maybe we r too different to be best of friends.
allow mi to stone n tink abt e past.
when i m completely ready to let go,
i would cut e card n throw it away.
but for now, let mi keep e tinge of hope n keep it in my file.
n u will always be my special friend.

to e 2nd one,
i m sorry.
e card is still lay there lying in my file n brought ard w mi everywhere.
there r many things i dun und.
but i tink tt's jus my stupid-ness that caused mi to tink so much.
do u noe why i wanna meet u tt day to get back my file?
that's becoz i wanna pass u sumthing.but i din get e chance.
sorry.
but to e 2nd special friend,
rest assured, e card wuld always lay there lying in my file till e day u r free to meet mi.
n i m sorry if i hurted u in any way.

n tears cont to fall n blur my vision.
i nd a shoulder to lean on now.
i m tired.

][.10.fe.15.][
][.n it hurts.][