][.Attitude.][

][.Attitude.][

hey bloggy i m back..haha today's blog shall be a reflection n thanks n goodbye entry..yup..

1st of all..reflections..
past few games of e A div i haf been playing like shit..getting disappointed wif myself once n again..thats so damm stupid of mi..got a "wake-up" scold from coach ytr..was realli a hard one..but that was onli for the moment..i guess its time i wake up from my no confidence land..missed my lan di(s) ytr..n felt like a fool..i can say wif confident..that isn't who i m..i may not be a gd player..but lan di(s) is sumthing that i haf almost absolute confident in myself de..so ytr..after e great scolding that is "dedicated" to mi by coach during e half time break..i tink i m finding myself back ba..slowly..gradually..e last shot i made be4 i got sub out..it was e feeling..jus like last yr when we were playing b div against jurong..jiu shi na zhong gan jue..

2nd..thanks..
i haf got lots of ppl to thank..but 1st of all..my thanks go out to vJ bball gals team 2006..hey..jus wanna say a v big thank u to all of u..thanks for e encouragements on court n off court..thanks for tolerating all my stupid mistakes..thanks..thanks team ! n yah..special thanks to rong for encouraging mi during e 2nd going to 3rd quad n after e game..thanks to kaixin who walked over n gave mi a pat on my head..sumtimes its enff..thanks to sheryl for ya encouragements n lets jia u n play well to keep coach mouth shut together tml ok =)..thanks to van for teaching mi how to be a better center..thanks to lu for her encouragements..thanks to ms tan..thanks to..thanks to..e list goes on..jus wanna say a v big thank you to vJ bball team..n yah..thanks to pam (doggy)thanks to auntie joy,qingzi jie..etc..thanks ! thanks lots !

3rd..goodbye..
goodbye to U (my foolish-ness)
goodbye to U ( my soft moves)
goodbye to U ( the weak inner mi)
goodbye to U (my lack of confidence)..

yup..anyway today's entry is also for myself to brace up n get prepared for tml's game..wanna thank coach for scolding mi that day too..although i hate it..but its e fact..its time to wake up..n i had..e more u dun trust mi..e more i wanna prove u wrong..*xingxin*..n yah..youth cup..hmm jus wanna say jia u to all my friends who are playing..regardless of playing for cst red , leng kee or etc..jus wanna say jia u n take care yeah..n to buddy n nut..jia u too..sorry that i din msg u buddy..was kind of tired..haha..n yup..thanks cindy coach (thou u will nv cum here de la).but yah..jus wanna say thanks..u noe why..n to npo..my attitude will not change =)..i promise..

hao la..take gd care every1 ! byee..jia u tml vJ !!!

][.FEarless.][
][.npo.][
][.i m not who u tink i m.][

][.10.fight on.15.][

][.10.fight on.15.][

yoz bloggy ! i m back..haha alright..shall blog abt today..
hmm today morning i jus refused to get out from my bed..
but after much thinking..
i decided to get up..
n haf a nice day..
n i had..hee thanks heaven..
i learnt alot from this fall..
n it jus makes mi stronger..=)

anyway went to tamp to "study" at short mary gold..wif fungi..den fungi n van..den van..haha be4 i met fungi..i went to bought a $8 bk..chi de..it says "mei you bu ke neng"=impossible is nothing..den i went to make stickers wif my name on it..haha..den read e bk while waiting for fungi..ok so she reach le..we went to buy foolscap..den went to haf lunch..den study..she went to cut hair n see her sham den after that wen n fungi came..haha sweet action no1 : fungi today pei mi go out ! sweet action no2 : wen bought mi my fav octopus de tako pachi ! hee..

alright..den study den van came..haha she taught mi e maths song..den tok a bit abt youth cup..n listened to this v nice n powerful song..hee den received a few msg-es now n den..after that went to meet daddy n mummy cz they were dere..den took cab hm together..hee felt so much better today..had my fill of food today..haha food nv fails to brighten up my day =p sweet action no3 : daddy's n mummy's understanding n concern..n yah..van's "sure can find e team de keng ding"

ok..so i reached home..n 1st time i do..on my com..hotmail..cz auntie joy asked mi to check my mail..haha i read e "random-ness"..n i cried again..1st time of e day..hee but its tears of gan dong..not sad..realli v gan dong..haha..its jus so sweet..so jus wanna say..thank you auntie joy ! thank you ah ma rong..xie xie ni men..hai you..auntie joy..my promise to u.."it will be e last time wo wei le...er ku le"..hee yup so thats my fourth sweet action of e day..: receiving auntie joy's random mail..hee xie xie ni..=P hen tian..

haha so overall ne..i had a great day..o yah..i tink i forget to say..but i wore my yellow no15.anthony band e whole day today..reminding myself to be strong..hee..n yah..i discovered wo hai you hen duo ren mei you xie..so here's my thank you list :

-my family
-wen,fungi,moi for their little actions (n of cz jing..i noe u r jus dere =p) my zhu tous..
-auntie joy n ah ma rong
-yaqi.ah sam
-mei
-sh
-si hui (buddy)
-sheryl
-qingzi jie
-van
-lqjl
-coach cindy

hee this is my thank you list for today..but those ppl i wanna thank is not jus all..refer to my ytr de thank you list too yeah =p hee there are jus too many ppl to thank..xie xie ni men..wo hao le ! its time to fight on..hee => Bu Neng Yi Zhi Yi Lai Bian Ren Gie Wo Yong Dai..Believe..Jiu Suan Feng Yu Yan Gai..Wo Ye Bu Pai Chong Lai !..hee n yah..abv are jus sum random shots from ytr..hee..n yah..for e pic of mi n lqjl..i shall edit it sumday n erase e face (qian xi's coach) behind us..=P haha..tc every1 ! dui bu qi..rang ni men dan xin le =)..

][.FEarless.][
][.npo.][
][.10.fight on.15.][
][.challenge for myself =).][

][.min. pt curve.i m at my min pt now.][

][.min. pt curve.i m at my min pt now.][

now its 1:15am mon morning..1/5/2006..
i shuld be sleeping..
but i can't..

qian xi vs alj.k jus now..
we lost..but i m thankful for this team too..
can't help crying..
esp when i heard "i can't believe this"..
it realli shocks mi to see that..

tears started rolling down at that moment..
hard work realli dun pay off..
u can work so hard while others rest..
but in e end..
everything doesn't matter..

e mood was kind of liven by e cindy coach whole body cramp incident..
was realli funny..
was feeling much better after that..
den stone dere wif ah sam n tok abt 10 yrs down e road..
while we looked at cindy n lingqin..

anyway be4 i cont..i mus say..thanks alj.k..its been my happiest time to be in this team during this period of time..

alright cont..

was toking abt u18..
den after that this n that..
den lingqin jiao lian suddenly ask mi sumthing..
i was kind of calm..
she told that she felt that i shuld..
n i told her..thanks..thats realli enff with her tinking like that..

after that we took our medals..
take 1 or 2 pics onli..
n went for dinner..
i took wif lqjl our no15..i hope moi will send mi e pics soon..
den dinner time..

everything was back to normal till cindy coach break that news to mi..
i held my tears back..
tried to cont e conversation..
acting calm n all..
n suddenly tears started rolling down..
n den splash..like water fall..
esp when coach told mi she wan to help mi ask why..
i told coach.."jin nian yi ding yao chu dui"..
she promise she will as long as we find enff player..

after that we left for hm..
can't control myself..
such a weakling man mi..

its jus over whelming for mi..
its been a tiring n hard yr..
getting kick out of u18..
playing as a bench player in vj n getting scolded by coach every now n den..
not getting selected for cst red..

once..twice..thrice..
how many times mus i fall..
told myself maybe i jus suxz..
but can't get over it so easily..

feeling negative..fatalistic..
i m jus not gd enff..
i told myself that..
but fungi say..its not that u r not gd..but its jus that they are better..

hmm den i tink of it..yesh its quite true..but why..why do i lose to popeye's wife..
i realli can't understand..
m i being egoist..
maybe i m..

den qingzi jie say..
maybe this is my min pt of a curve graph..
after this min pt..i will curve upwards again ?..
n a gd player..a winner shuld not give up..
but instead hang on..

so i decided to find players for e team..
buddy is also trying hard wif mi..
but moi say i a bit stubborn..
hmm maybe i m..

i also dunno wad i wan..
i jus dun wan to give up without a fight..
jus wanna thank buddy for trying so hard with mi..
wanna thank qingzi jie for her encouragments..
wanna thank fungi..
wanna thank moi..
wanna thank van..
wanna thank auntie joy for taking e risk wif mi..
wanna thank lingqin jiao lian..
wanna thank coach cindy..
wanna thank my family for being so understanding..

maybe i shuld end here le..take gd care evey1 ! byee..maybe u jus wun get wad u wan ba..its fate..

..bruised n battered..
..dazed n shattered..
..now it hurts..

thanks npo..thanks..*all-out attitude*..wo zhen de jing li le..zhi shi..wo ye wu neng wei li le..dan xie xie ni gie wo de keng ding..its a kind of comfort to noe that u do believe in mi..

][.FEarless.][
][.<3 alj.k.][
][.guardian angel.][
][.give mi e courage n faith to fight on.][
][.15.][

][.?.][

][.?.][

haha bloggy..today's blog shall be ? ba..wanted to give it a nice name..but can't tink of any..so yup..jiu use ? ba..its jus like my heart now..haha alright..pardon mi if u tink its lame..cz i jus wanna tok to bloggy n hopefully my guardian angel..if U r realli around for mi..

why is this so..
is it my heart..
my mind..
or my body..

i can sense that i m changing..
not for e better..
but for e worst..
is this e result of time..
or jus myself..

nowadays..
i get tired so easily..
haf so much doubts abt myself..

lost in wad i once loved so much..
i may sound fatalistic..
pessimistic to many..

but jus how much they noe..
in my heart..
i m screaming out loud..
"wo bu xiang fang qi..wo zai zhi zuo zhe"..

since young..
i haf nv realli accomplish anything..
thou i seems to haf..

now in jc..
i m jus a nobody..
realli..
nobody..

i lost it..
i m losing it..

i can't stand it when tears flow once n again..
i tink this is bad..
occassionally tearing..
i tink its a gd form of stress relieve..

but now..
its like almost now n then..
n i hate myself for being that weak..
i tried to hold em bac..
but i can't..
n it suxz..

dere's no pt in telling any1..
dere's no sol..
in e end..
i noe..
its sumthing that i haf gotta face..
by myself..

will i be able to find back wad i lost..
will i be able to love wad i used to love..
will i be able to walk on this bumpy road which i fall every now n den n get hurt..
will i be able to hold on to e love..
will i be able to be who i used to be..

i m still trying..
thou i always question my heart..
is it true?..ni zhen de bu xiang fang qi ma..

hao la bloggy..jus being random..life hasn't been vvv happy nowadays..its affecting mi..maybe i shall stop all these shit..stop myself from affecting myself..yup..anyway i saw these words at sum1's blog..n i tink its v meaningful..so jus wanna share wif all.. " 人往往都是要等到失去后，才会懂得如何去珍惜。但往往在拥有时，又会遗忘珍惜的可贵 " it means ppl usually only learn how to treasure sumthing after he/she lose it..but when he/she own that thing..he/she forget e importance of treasuring once again..

haha hao la..end here le..n yup..take gd care every1 ! tml is alj.k vs qian xi de finals..i pray..*xingxin*..n yah..rmb..there are reasons to be sad..there mus be reasons to be happy too..yah..so..*smilez* =)

][.FEarless.][
][.lousy soul.][

][.i m jus a kid.][

][.i m jus a kid.][

haha bloggy..discovered that i haven been blogging for like days huh..haha actually everyday i on my com..i m tempted to blog..there's jus so much i wanna say..but i dunno why..i jus din haf e "energy" to blog..but today i mus..i promise..

anyway today its been a long time since i haf 1 after another de trngs..haha o yah..be4 i start on bball..mus tok abt studies..i tink i realli suxz..my hist lect test is bound to fail..i m lost in maths..lost in econs..lost in hist..lost in lit..lost in every sub..i dunno how m i going to survive for my mye..i noe i can't escape from it..n i will nv choose e jump down de way as a way out..i dun haf e courage..i dun wan e regrets..so i guess i wuld jus haf to wake up..buck up..pull up my socks..or else..face e music..i will try to get myself focused on my studies as soon season ends..nothing seems to matter more than bball now..

haha these few days haf been..hmm lots of things going thru my mind.."can wads lost be found again ?..i dunno..but i dun wanna give up..do i realli mean it ?..i asked myself again.." haha i dunno..i realli dunno..e feeling jus isn't e same as be4..i watched e videos n discovered jus how lousy i m..i can't play e game i hope i play..every game has became another day of disappointment day for myself..which shuld not be e way..yup..so been rather down..but whenever i train there..i find that i m enjoying e game that i love..i realli love trng dere thou i m always corrected on my mistakes..but e encouragements dere is more than enff to keep mi going on..thanks alj.k..thanks for letting mi enjoy e game which is giving mi stress unknowingly..thanks for letting mi wanna fight hard n go on whenever i feel that i suxz..

haha anyway..yup..abt today..had combine sch red selection..followed by trng bac in sch..followed by alj trng..hmm e 1st event of e day..thanks n sorry auntie joy..thanks for fighting hard..n yup hope ya knee will be ok..realli feel quite agrh when saw ya hurt ya knee..like damm it..haha all we wanted was to risk it again..all i wanted was to risk it all again..why mus this happen..damm it =p..anyway dun wanna tok much abt e selections..haha call it pride of wadever..jus wanted to risk it all..

den back to sch trng..haha stress..or rather..inner-self trying hard to fight..its not easy dere..its fun..at e same time stress..i dunno..haha maybe coz its e season n every1 is tired..haha go vj !..jia u ba..haha..alright..den today coach came to tok to mi..telling mi that he want to let mi "tuo tai huan gu once this season end"..haha at that split sec..i felt a gush of dunno wad e feeling overwhelming la..haha hafing to change my shooting..my lay up..my way of playing..haha its gonna be nice if i can make it..coach say 1 yr is more than enff..haha hmm wadever it is..i noe its going to be a tough period then..n i m ready to fight hard..as long as coach is willing to train mi..i m prepared..to change..haha hopefully for e better n not e worse..cz i suxz now..

den hmm went to alj trng..trust mi..i m tired le..jus cheng-ing n psycho-ing myself that i m not..n yah..fight hard..i dun realli mean fight la..but ya..jus train hard..hee anyway trng was a nice one..i found e kind of game that i enjoy once again..so shuang so shuang..i realli love it..e gan jue of it..haha..anyway sun is e finals le..thou i wun play..but i will support this team all e way de..*xingxin* haha jia u ba snrs ! hee fight hard ! its gonna be e last time we will be called alj.k le..so fight hard n leave a nice history for alj.k yeah !

hao la..end here le..i m tired..going to slp..tml after trng..i promise..i gotta pack my file n prepare to study..take gd care every1..byee..

][.FEarless.][
][.npo.][
][.haha.i get tired too.][
][.fight hard.][

][.happy soul.][

][.happy soul.][

disappointment gone..
in replacement..
i haf a whole bag of happiness..

ah..realli relieved..
everything zhong suan cum to a happy ending..
thanks heaven..

haha..hao la..thanks lots to all..i m feeling ok le..in fact gd..yup..jus wanna blog down n rmb this..jus now alj vs hongkah..den hmm qian xi vs home u..v interesting game..haha..

hao la..end here le..still got lots to do..n yah..went to dance concert ytr wif zhu tous n mei..was a great one ba..n i jus love being wif em.."star shines e brightest at ya darkest moments"..yesh..quite true to mi..jus like best friends who are there for u at ya darkest moments..

take gd care evey1 !..byee..

][.FEarless.][
][.npo.][
][.happy soul.][
][.heard of ya com wif olieve tml.][
][.waffle.][

][.pls tell mi it isn't so.][

][.pls tell mi it isn't so.][

guardian angel...
pls tell mi that it is an illusion..
pls tell mi that it isn't true..
i hate to think of you in that way..

n i nv wan to think of you in that way..
u'r image to mi is nv like this..

wadever u jus did jus hurts mi so..
thou it seems nothing much..
i can't help crying..
i m realli sorry..
but it jus hurts..
u may think that i m silly or crazy if u noe how hurt i feels now..

but i bet u wun noe..
cz u nv knew how much i respected u..
n jus how perfect u always was to mi..

haiz..
i hope this is jus an illusion..
a nightmare..
one which i will get over n done wif..
once i wake up from my lala land..
but it isn't n it jus hurts..

shughs..damm..
i pray..let mi forget abt all these..
pls..
as hard as i noe it is..
all i can is to remind myself of how perfect u was to mi..

][.FEarless.][
][.disappointed soul.][
][.npo.][

][.thoughts.][

][.thoughts.][

hey bloggy..gotta work to do..but i m feeling tired..so decided to blog instead..blog down a little abt my last wk..den i shall go rest le..

haha anyway last wk was my "meet up wif old pals wK"..haha met up wif jo,xueli,yongqing together wif janice la..went for dinner at pasta..den took neoprints..haha its always nice to meet up wif old friends..

den yah..on that same day..which is sat..i went to pray too..wif rong n moi..went guanyin temple wif rong n moi..den after that went thai temple wif moi n her family..haha its been a long time since i go temple n pray etc le..i realli prayed wif all my heart for..haha that one ne..jiu dun nd to say le ba..but yah..i pray..=)..

den hmm sun was another nice day..met up wif zhu tous men..went to airport de t2 de bk to study..but we din study much also..jiu bei gan zou le..haha den slack ard..after that i left wif wen..while fungi left wif jing..that moi got lesson so nv meet up wif us..haha went to alj mac to study while wen go her church..on e way dere..i listened to guang liang de yue ding..haha nice song..hmm den after that is alj vs home u de match..haha i realli v touched by e match..every single thing..i was realli praying hard..den at e last part i realli v touched..when i saw how happy every1 was..was so proud of em..hee n i will nv forget that moment when there's a "reaction for the first time"..haha e last time since i see e whole team so happy n hug each other is during nat finals 14/4/2005..haha i will nv forget that day..haha

hmm anyway yah..that was my weekend..realli been a nice one..being able to meet up wif em all..haha i miss em..esp "its all about us" ->zhu tous..haha den hmm today is mon..e 1st match of a div..vs acjc..haha yup yeah..won..cont to jia u ba vj! haha as for myself i gotta brace up n fight hard..fight well..fight smart..hee..haha hao la..been a long time since i get to play in a real match le..so say real de..a bit tired la..haha

hao la..shall end here le..wanna slp le..haha take gd care every1! byee..

][.FEarless.][
][.zxor opn.][
][.foul in.][
][.fight hard.][

][.every moment is special.coz u will nv get to re-live it.cherish.][

][.every moment is special.coz u will nv get to re-live it.cherish.][

hey bloggy..i m blogging..again..haha feeling quite ok la..jus lazy to do my Arithmetic Progression hw..its getting mi all AP le..sianz..so decided to blog n slp..muhahaha

alright..anyway today's blog is to encourage my friends out there..esp those feeling down..jus wanna say jia u to all !!! like wad my blog title is today..every moment is special..coz u will nv get to re-live it..Forgetting e unhappy events and memories is important..
But whats even more important is to remember the happy moments..cherish every moment..

n yah..every moment is special..everybody is also special..a special individual who will find friends who realli appreciate u..so dun give in when ya heart wants to..cz sumday..u will meet ya right friends..i do appreciate u =)..realli do..

haha hao la..end here le..kinda of tired..take gd care every1 ! season is cuming le..so to all my team mates n friends out dere..drink more h2o n rest well ok..haha

..shugs..
miss u all..
not much..
but jus that v much..



][.FEarless.][
][.guardian angels.][

][.Determination.][

][.Determination.][

haha hiz bloggy..hmm today's blog ne..is v random de la =p..jus wanna blog down sum thoughts n feelings..

hee anyway..mon is such a long n tiring day..but nbm la..i survived it le..hee..yup..anyway i saw jojo n yongqing today !!! haha happy happy..train half way then caught them studying at e mpcc de library..haha we jus waved like sum crazy little kids..*opps or is it jus mi =p*..hee anyway it was great seeing em..miss em..haha

hmm wad else..hao la..jus wanna share wif all this quote regarding..

..Determination..
If your can't get through the mountain , try going around it..
If you can't go around it , try going over it..
If you can't go over it , ask yourself if getting over to the other side is all that important..
If it is , set your heart out to dig a tunnel through it.. =D

haha think its real nice n meaningful..so jus wanna share n hope all will get sum motivation or maybe feel inspired ? haha if u r not..also nbm la..take it as i blogging down for my own memos yeah..hee

haha yup..n yah !!! this wk is international friendship week...hee so jus wanna say hApPy fRieNdShiP weEk to all ! haha...special thanks to all my friends out there..all who haf crossed my path of life in one way or another..those whom i lost contact wif n those whom i still haf contacts wif..those whom i haf met yrs ago..n haf been by my sides all these yrs..those whom made mi awe at e way time dun matter as much at times..those whom believe in mi even when i cease to believe in myself..haha..thanks to all..especially to my special n best friends ! haha u noe who u r..

hao la..end here le..once again..happy friendship wk my friends ! treasure u..thanks for everything..byee..take care n jia u for ya wk !!!

][.FEarless.][
][.*smile*cz ya smile is e reason for many others to smile.][
][.taking for eg.mine.][
][.but there's no need to brave a smile when u r down.][

][.a friend in need.is a friend indeed.][

][.a friend in need.is a friend indeed.][

ytr had 2 on 2..
hmm thank you team mates- yaqi n moi..
haha street basketball had nv ever gave mi a nice ending..
maybe i shuld pray be4 i play e nxt one..
if there is any in e future..

haha n yah..i dunno why..but haf u ever tried calling onli that few ppl when u r down n feel that u need a friend..haha it was the first time i did that..i felt down n 4 ppl pop up in my mind..(it shuld be 5 de but ytr quarrelled wif 1..but nbm)..yah..anyway i called this 4 special ppl..n 2 "replied"..

..a friend in need.is a friend indeed..
wanna thank 2 special ppl..
they are..joy n wen..

thanks a million auntie joy..for all e encouragments..n by jus being there..
"Doesn't matter if i win or the colour of my skin.cuz the race is all about believing in yourself.i dream i can run like the wind and be strong when my heart wants to give in"
haha thanks a million..its more than words can say..=p i realli appreciate u..looking forward to our sandcastles =) haha..i will make e nicer one de la..no worries =p

n of cz wen..i wanna thank her more than any1..words cannot describe how touched i m by her..makes mi believe that true friendship realli exists..
when u jus nd sum1 there for u to lean on..jus a call n she is there..
when u nd sum1 to be dere wif u..she tries her best to be dere n she was dere wif u..
when u r tired n nd sum1 to acc u thur e sad nite..she is dere..
to share wif u e sorrows n bring you the laughters which washes away your pain..
she misses her bus n wait for her nxt jus to acc u a little more..
she makes exception..things that she usually dislikes..she made an exception jus to make u happy n cheer u up..
she acc u no matter how tired she is..
wad more can i ask for..thanks a million wen..thanks for accompanying mi thur my darkest moments all these 8+ yrs..i realli appreciate u..n jus like wad u say ytr.."wo shi zai shi ge hao ren"..haha yes..ni zhen de shi yi ge hao ren..er qie shi wo zhe yi shen nan de yong you de hao peng you..

haha n yah..as i always say..there r reasons to be sad..there mus be reasons to be happy too..i was sad..but i was happy too..happy over ? hafing such special friends..who wuld jus be there for u..n i finally noe how to use e small screen de cam le..haha how stupid can i be man..my own fone n i dunno how to use..nd auntie joy to teach =p haha yah..anyway i learnt how to use it le..jiu went ard taking wif ppl..haha such as shao ji..yaqi..haha of cz got auntie joy la..dun nd to say de.ppl teach mi how to use cam leh ;p den took wif cindy coach also..haha she ytr a bit not like coach like this..haha..den took wif lqjl too..haha n discovered she changed her fone to sony ericsson too =p

haha hao la..better end here n get down to my hw le..haven done any for goodness sake..take care every1! byee..n thanks to all..

][.FEarless.][
][.jus be dere for mi..will u..my guardian angel.][

][.song of my heart.][

][.song of my heart.][

was pondering wad song shuld i listen to..
browsing thur my windows media player..
wondering wad song shuld i click n listen to..

den there came this song..
this song is out to all those special people in my heart..
n e one person that matters e most..
u noe who u are..
doesn't matter for now..
doesn't matter later..
all i gonna do is make that come..
turn around..
there u are..
this is out to you from the bottom of my heart..
i wanna say one thing..thank you"

haha yup..n i tink its jus so nice..haha dun nd to switch songs le..haha now i m listening to it once again..e song that made mi teared..hee but now i m listening in quite a nice mood..cz its been quite a nice wk..yup..n this song ne..lots of memories..i miss em..

yup..anyway toking abt my wk..lets go in a backward n reverse gear order yeah..been tiring..i m so sick of maths..that i din bother doing it in e library today when i told myself i mus..sianz..i noe this is so bad..yah..but alright..i will jia u de..jus nd a break..this wk de wo..quite slack de..haiz..super tired man..whenever season is cuming or wadever..i jus can't help but tink abt it..n yah..my legs hurts..right knee is secreting more lime juice now n den..maybe is becoz i suan ppl too much le..n left leg..sianz..i tink i e ham n e string..

yup anyway..today had opt trng..played played..den ate prata by rong n trina n vk..den went for alj trng..omg..i waited for 55 for like 30mins..wait until wan to feng diao n wanted to take cab de..lucky van say dun..den n phew..i reached on time..so yah..sat dere..den that woman told van..so van asked abt it..i also dunno how to say..haha den later van told lqjl..den hmm yah..bei cindy coach suan abt my socks n my shoes pei my whole attire la..cz i was wearing vj pe n blue jersey shorts..exact colour of e shoes..den chatted wif lqjl a while regarding e legs..haha..den yah..trng starting le..it drizzle a little..den cindy coach say..lets go..all e adults go nat trng..den we (onli moi n me) supposed to go home to rest..yup..so now i m here at home..resting..icing my legs..

hmm wad else..its been a tiring wk..been laming my way in sch..trying to get rid of my tiredness..n suan-ing jan n ma tong n laming every1 i can find..yah..hmm wad else..trainings ? tons of endless work ? revision piling up ? spending time in e library be4 trngs ? after trng reach home slp ?..where is my life my..saw this bk in library today.."get a life"..haha i m not mouring abt my life..cz i love it..e way it is..but its tiring..but yup..jia u jia u every1 !

haha n yah..went to watch nat youth vs sum taiwan team..haha oo yah..be4 i cont..thanks auntie joy for e chocs..haha always haf food de =P yum yum..hee..yah..abt e match..hmm wad can i say..haha was telling auntie that its a mixture of feelings..relieved..at e same time a bit of pain la..haha jus a bit..n jus wanna tell sum1..jia u ! press on ! hee yah..u noe who u r ;p (i guess)

hmm n yah la..this is my wk..haha been nice..short..tiring..tml going to play 2 on 2..wif yaqi n moi..haha jia u le team mates ! hope tml will everything go smoothly..haha n best is can win la..but most impt is..no injuries..n enjoy e game =) hao la..end here le..take care every1 ! byee..hope i haf gd new to blog tml yeah ! =D

n yah..got things to say to sum..but lazy to msg..
to mei :
hope u still coping well ok..jia u ! anything msg mi..

to forever5:
miss u all..hope u all still going out for movie tml la..n enjoy it yeah..take care ! n yah..e song is our song zhu tous ! =)

to juniors :
jia u..dun be too sad..i also dunno what to say..yah..*sayang sayang*

~dun cry ah~
~i wun de~
~i will make sure i smile~
~n i will make sure i tell u gd news~
~i will try~

][.FEarless.][
][.zxor opn.][
][.i dunno how.i also dunno how =P.][
][.be my guardian angel, will u ?.][

][.wad a day.=).][

][.wad a day.=).][

haha hiz bloggy..hmm jus discovered that i haven been blogging for a wk..so today mus blog le..cannot isolate "u" =p..

haha anyway wanted to blog abt my wk de..but jus discovered that sumtimes when sumthings pass le..will be kinda of lazy n tired to blog abt it =p..hee so alright..i shall give a brief summary of e wk..n my day (today =p)

haha hmm my wk..i can onli say i tried to change..i mean i set my mind on focusing n trying to catch up wif my work..that i tink i became quite a" horrendous" person..haha so jus wanna say paiseh le sh..n yah..indeed its been a v draining wk..trying to catch up wif all my work esp maths..n discovered that i m still way way behind..n everytime i can onli tell myself..be like a tortise " it dun matter how slow u go..as long as u dun stop" + "wei zai hu de ren nu li"

haha yah..so its realli been a v tiring wk..that i over slept n almost went to e airport after alj trng that day..ooo n yah..shall blog abt today le..actually i shuld be at trng now de..but today's trng is cancelled due to e rain..kind of expected cz it was realli raining heavily jus now..n yah..hmm i realli like to say sumthings sumtimes is a blessing in disguise..cz i missed my 53 jus now..n after i missed e bus..i received e msg that today's trng is cancelled..so jus walk back home from e bus stop..haha felt so hmm dunno how to say..but feel that "blessing in disguise" is realli true at times ba..hee..

den wads nxt..mummy asked mi to pass an umbrella n her ez link card to her..so i went down e blk n saw e bus at e bus-stop n is approaching e bus stop mummy n gugu are at soon le..so i jus chiong-ed all e way..n lucky mi..i made it..haha i noe this is v childish..but it jus makes my day..haha got a kind of v happy for no reason de gan jue..maybe cz i ran in e rain ba..e gan jue realli v nice..haha jus that a bit cold =p

haha hao la..shall end here le..today is my super forgetful day too..i wrapped e present le..den discovered i nv put this in..nv put that in..haha n yah..i mus say i guess my fone bill for this mth will not be that high..cz my hp spoilt le ! n it need 2 wks more for repairations cz e spare parts not available yeah =(..so currently i m using my a bit siao de spare fone which receive msgs onli like a few hrs later..but mummy went to c if can sign for another spare fone for mi le..so hope she cum bac wif it la..hee byee every1 + tc ! gotta go rest n pia my lit , hist n maths assignment le..*faints*..

][.FEarless.][
][.npo.][
][.forgetful prezzie.][

][.wad a day.=).][

][.i tink too much.][

][.i tink too much.][

hey bloggy..sorry to vent my anger on u ytr..yup..today is a better day..thou nothing much happen..hmm i mean i played a lousy 2 mins..but there are other things that r worth my smile too..

i m sorry n i guessed i realli think too much ytr le..realli..wonder wad was going on on my mind ytr too..but today yeah..i feel much relaxed now..e supposed "problem" are no longer dere..feel so relieved now..realli..*ahhhh*

paiseh to forever5..cz i was realli being over-sensitive..yup..sorry..hmm anyway..yah..today is a nice day..apart from e lousy 2 min n e air-ball..but wadever is over is over..went out wif mei today..den went airport to send jit off..den e game..

jus another simple day..but at least dere r reasons for mi to smile from e bottom of my heart..

hao la..take gd care every1 ! byee..


][.FEarless.][
][.npo.][
][.sincerity.best.present.][
][.i promise.][
][.1min.15sec.][

][.it hurts when others misunderstand.but.it hurts more when its u all.][

][.it hurts when others misunderstand.but.it hurts more when its u all.][

this few days..
so short..
yet so tiring..

sorry bloggy that i haven been blogging these few days..
so much happened..
so many qns in my mind..
i tot abt so much..
so much..

i came to one decision after another..
advice cum one after another..
every1 has their concern..
i appreciate it..
at the same time i m lost..

every1 has a pt..
this few days i haf been rather negative too..

today was another tiring day..
after e movie i tot it wuld be a better day..
but i was jus told of sumthing..
n it pushes mi back to e sad alley..

jus like wad i say..
it dun matters as much if its others..
but it hurts a lot when is u all..

it hurts..
we grow..
n we realli changed..
or is it jus mi..

if i can..
i wuld ask fairy god-ma to stop all this..
we r inflicting pain on one another..

i knew this wuld happen..
every1 cares for each another..
but as we go abt our schedule..
as we faces e ups n downs of life..
we r no longer there for each another..
yes..maybe morally..
but that seems to be all..

i miss e days at e back of e classrm..
when we wuld jus ignore abt e lessons going on..
n chat all we wan..
i miss e days when u wuld share wif mi ya i-pod during recess..

i miss e days when we wuld take bus together n bth abt y3..
i miss e days when u hate e smell of waffle..but yet acc mi to buy it..n even carry it for mi thou u wuld grumble..

i miss e days when we wuld chat wif one another till 10..n u nd to slp..

i miss e days..so much i missed..that if i list..it wuld jus go on non-stop..i miss those simple n sweet days..when i always go ard n feel happy cz i noe u all r jus there for mi..so near to mi..i noe friendship is not measured by distance..but now as i faces my life..i encouter all this stuffs..i dunno how..jus how much i wish u all were wif mi..how much i wished we were in e same jc jus like wad we had wanted to be when we left our pri sch for sec sch..we wanted to b in e same sec sch..jus how much n selfish i m to wanna keep u all wif mi..but its impossible..

i admit..i m not making enff time for u all..or in fact..its always u all making e time for us..i hate e way it is now..our friendship was always so perfect to mi..realli..i hate myself for letting things became this way..e way it is now..i hate it..it suxz..

u all dun like to hear sorry..n i hate to say it to u all too..i hope i wun haf to say that to u all anymore..
went to our blog..n fungi blogged sumthing..i tink they r all v meaningful..but i added my own comments..

1) If u shuld die be4 mi..ask if u can bring a friend along..
2)If u leave to a 100..i wanna live to a 100-1..cz i nv wanna live a day without u..*for this..i wuld say..if u live to a 100..i wuld wan to live to a 101 cz i wuld nv wanna c u cry*
3)True friendship is like sound health.the value of it is seldom known until its lost.*i nv ever wanna try to lose it*
4)A real friend is one who walks in when e whole world walks out.
5)Dun walk infront of mi..i may not follow..dun walk behind mi..i may not lead..jus walk beside mi n be my friends forever..*sumtimes u may not see mi beside..cz i jus wanna catch u when u fall*
6)Strangers are jus friends waiting to happen..friends r e bacon bits of a salad bowl..
7)Friendship is one mind in 2 bodies.its god's way of taking care of us.
8)I lean on u.n u lean on mi.n we will be ok.
9)If all my friends were to jump of e bridge..i wun jump wif em..but i will be at e bottom to catch em..
10)Every1 hears what u say..friends listen to wad u say..best friends listen to wad u dun say..*i agree totally*
11)We all take diff paths in life..but no matter where we go..we take a little of one another..*how much i wish we wun haf to take diff paths*
12)My father always say..when u die n u haf 5 real friends..u haf had a great life..*i tink i haf had a great life le*
13)hold a true friend with both hands..
14)A friend is one who noes e song in ya heart n can sing it for u when u haf forgotten e words..* u all always does that for mi*
15)Love starts wif a smile.grows wif a kiss.ends with a tear.
16)A best friend is like a 4 leave clover.hard to find and lucky to haf.
17)True friendship nv ends.friends r forever.
18)gd friends are like stars..u dun always see em..but u noe that they are there forever..
19)when it hurts to look back.n scared to look forward.u can always look beside n ya best friend will be dere wif u.
20)a friend is one who believes in u even when u ceased to believe in yaself..*i love this*


alright..shall end here bloggy..take care every1 ! ..byee..pardon mi today..


][.FEarless.][
][.i m always e one inflicting e pain.][
][.jus wanna say.][
][.it hurts too.][

][.gotta get the shots in.n the rebounds down.][

][.gotta get the shots in.n the rebounds down.][

hey bloggy..paiseh ah..abandon u for e past few days..cz realli super tired..haha..wanted to blog abt e past few days..but all i can rmb now is..luckily i finished my hist essay by today..

haha yah..anyway today's blog is jus a random one..hmm today vj trng..we played match..haha shugs my free throw is horrendous..yah realli..n i m not doing all e center moves n not getting e rebounds that i shuld..shugs..this can't go on..if not how to help n win together wif em as a team ne..tml mus jia u le..tml got optional trng..hope its gonna be fun n at e same time not so tired..or else at nite i sure puncture de =p..hee hao la..i m looking forward to e season..wondering how e season n A div is exactly like..

haha n yah..hmm kind of exicted ! cz finally its gonna be e weekend le..not that its gonna be of any diff..but jus excited by e thought that dun nd to attend tutorial n lect for 2 days..hee wad else..o yah !!! although i was so tired cz of e rushing of hist essay..haha i din slp a wink at all during today's lect ! hee find this such a great achievement that i told jan that its e 1st time in my jc life that i managed to stay awake n listen to all e lects n tutorials..haha great achievement to myself =D hee

hao la..i m kind of tired le..so end here le la..take gd care yeah every1 ! byee..

..off to start my sewing..heh heh

][.FEarless.][
][.drenched.][
][.took up bball becoz of u all.][
][.but now my time is taken up by it.][
][.but i haf nv regreted.][
][.coz everyday i play e game.][
][.i m reminded of US.][

][.wo she mer dou bu xiang qu xiang.][

][.wo she mer dou bu xiang qu xiang.][

yah bloggy..i dun wanna tink abt a single thing..i jus off my hp..i wanna ignore everything..yah..actually i jus wanna take my mind off sumthing..
sumthing that take up so much of my life..

imagine myself in a world wif onli it..now i wanna walk out of this world..close e doors behind mi..n go into e other world..e world of nature..peace..happiness..i can't exactly tell u wad i visualised..but i seems to be walking into a piece of greenland..so nice so nice..yes..thats wad i wan..take a deep breathe..take a walk..all alone or maybe wif a gd companion..sum1 wbom i trust n respect..sum1..i dunno who that sum1 is..maybe alone wun be a bad choice too..

walk..slowly..peacefully..enjoying every moment of being alone.laying on the greenland..with the clouds abv me..so nice so nice..after enff rest..get up n cont walking..along e beach..see e sunset..den walk towards another greenland..lay down dere n gaze at e stars..e whole sky wif onli stars..beautiful..how wonderful can it be..dun wan to tink of wads behind e doors..wadever that i had left behind in e other world..yup..so nice so nice..

thats wad i suddenly feel..so jus wanna blog down..dunno wad to say..i jus wan to take my mind of it..dun wan to tink abt it..dun wan to be affected by it..dun wan..once or twice is enff..1st is that team..now is this team..how many times must this happen..i rmb sum1 once told mi to treasure my playing time now..cz it will becum more complicated..n it wun be as enjoyable as be4..n i tink it already is le..its diff..thats all i can say..

yah..if onli i can..i will..take a break..a short one..not that i m tired..i jus wan one..dun be bothered by wad i say..but i may not wish to tok abt it this few days..so if u tink u noe wad i m tinking..thanks..wuld appreciate it if u dun tok to mi abt it for a day..n let it be tml yeah..*peace*..maybe i will feel much refreshed after that..

hao la..bloggy..i end here le..so much to do..so much..take gd care every1 !..byee..n yah..pls dun take wad i blog to heart..its jus my v this moment de gan jue..byee..

][.FEarless.][
][.npo.][
][.is it a process every1 mus be thru.][

][.jus wanna enjoy every moment of the game.][

][.jus wanna enjoy every moment of the game.][

y0z bloggy..hee i gotta pack my file n bag n do my inequalities for tml..but..hmm i m feeling a little happy tonite..so decided to blog 1st be4 i go complete my hw n slp be4 11:30..thats my aim =p hehe

alright..hmm today..sun..started out quite simple..slept till 11am..den was chao xing by my dad..cz he was vaccumming e floor..den breakfast..lunch..+ completed tues wif morrie !!! o mian..tues wif morrie n the five ppl u meet in heaven r realli vvv nice bks la..that day i saw em at popular..wanted to buy em..but mummy say read be4 le dun wan..so bought another one for mi..mus thank mummy for that bk..cz it cost quite a bit..but i shall save up for this 2 bks which i tink is so nice la..hee

so after that..left home for sbc at 3:30 like this..reached dere quite early..den changed n rest..played againist stackers..hmm not a bad game for e team..=D..den after that went to bathe..haha yun2 encoutered a millipede..scary scary..after that went to watch match..den had a waffle..hee cz lqjl say she wanted to buy after e game..so i asked for one la..mei xiang dao nobody else wan..so paiseh..hee so watch e game le..den went for dinner wif family..den took a cab bac..

haha yeah..sun is my family day..*5milez*..happy happy family day..+ today is a happy day..haha

haha hao la..go le..take care every1 ! byee..

happy happy..
jus a v simple kind of happy..
where i will jus smile frm e heart..
hee..
chat..waffle..happy..

][.FEarless.][
][.npo.][
][.haha.happy.moments.][

][.i m loving it.][

][.i m loving it.][

haha lol bloggy !!! i m finally back to update =D hee gotta lots to say..but e past few days was realli busy man..i mean this holidays isn't any holidays for mi..as usual.. but nbm..i m enjoying it la..cz read tues wif morrie den it teaches mi lots..anyway abv are jus sum pics la..randomly de..dere r still many others..shall post nxt time..but mus thank sheryl n moi for sending mi 1st ;p hee

haha yah..so it started wif mon-wed at training camp..hmm this camp ah..i realli allowed myself to stretch to e limits le..was tired out by e camp..but once it ended i felt so energetic tor !!! haha jkjk..i mean i felt much more prepared for e season..cz like got more stamina n stuffs la..hmm fei hua..running so much everyday..no stamina also mus haf le la..din try running 6km be4..din tot that i can make it..but yeah..all of us did it..den hmm all those trngs..wa..realli v tired..haha yah..so spent 3 days of my hols in camp le..with e team..n my room-mates are nice..they are rong n vk (xy)..hee den quite an enjoyable one ba..but jus sad cz i din get to go to 4a's class bbq..den that nice lx ask mi go hell la ;p haha jkjk..but i do miss e class..miss 4a now that i m in jc ;p..haiz..

anyway yah..wed after e camp..went to watch match at sbc..den came home n pia my vcds.."devil beside u"..realli nice man !!! thanks jing for lending it to me !!! haha its such a tear jerking show la..touching n sweet show..bth bth..haha so watched till 3plus..den was asked to go slp..so slept till 12 on thurs..woke up n cont watching till evening den went for trng..another one which i screwed up..sianz..but nbm..

so today's fri..haha had friendly wif ijc..hmm realli not v well played thou we won..was quite disappointed wif it..cz its like i was looking forward to a much better team after e camp..kind of disappointed la..in myself..in everything..haha but its ok la..there's still a little time..to buck up..to jia u..i realli hope n pray..i can sense e anxious-ness in every1..but i hope that there's more trust..trust in each other..realli..not comparing anything..but it was e mutal trust that we haf in each another that allowed us to play a game at our own pace in ahs..n i realli hope that it will be e same in vj..we haf gd players..but we nd e trust n confidence..jia u ba da jia !

so after e game..went to saeke sushi..coach's treat..o mian realli eat till i wanna puke le la..was so hungry be4 e game de la..den after that took a lift from mr lim..den took 12..to meet wen at 230..hai sorry jing !!! cz of e treat which ended quite late..we nv go to e food fair as intended..sorry sorry jing !!! haiz..once again..sorry zhu tous !!!

hmm yah..anyway thats my wk..end here le every1 ! take gd care yeah !!! byee..

i m loving it..

][.FEarless.][
][.tues wif morrie.][

][.every ending is another beginning.we just dunno it at that time.][

][.every ending is another beginning.we just dunno it at that time.][

hey bloggy..i m jus back from ayeoneswee's gathering..had bbq at kallayn's place..hmm i haven blogged much for this wk..but its not becoz i got nothing to blog..but becoz i haf jus so much n too much that i haf no energy to blog..feel so tired nowadays..

alright..shall do a recap abt my wk..hmm i m in love with this song called ->Kiss Goodbye by wang li hong..its realli a nice n sad song..e gan jue la..n wen jus send mi loads of nice songs ytr..n i swear they are realli nice..each n every song dou shi i like de those kind..thanks wen..

][.my life.][
i had jus finished reading the five ppl u meet in heaven a few days ago..borrowed e bk from jasmin..its realli a nice bk..simple n sweet..i dunno i jus liked it..taking for eg. my blog title for today is based on e bk de..i m now embarking on tues with morrie..e starting is already v nice le..thanks yongqin for lending mi e bk..hee..hope i can finish it by this wk la..i tink its realli one bk that i will like a lot ba..hee

den wad else..had orientation on mon n tues during this wk..but i pon-ed e whole of o2..haha o mian..this is e 1st ever time that i pon-ed sumtime..1st day was becoz had trng den after that coach treat swensense..anyway that trng suxz..cz i m realli v sianz le..had been trng for dunno how many consect days..yah..anyway it wasn;t realli a nice trng..but e day ended quite nice la..jus v simple..

den hmm tues..had o2 too..but din go..slacked with 06A13 n bought our uni..slacked n crap in v21 till 12plus 1 den went to watch nau chiaug vs anderson de finals..it was quite a nice game ba..but nau chiaug lost la..felt kind of sad for em..cz..haha dunno..ke xi ba..den after that went back for gym den went for alj trng..e trng was slack..but i was realli tired out by e gym le..so v nua..we shot 100 balls..den played 4 on 4..5 sets of it..a nice day..a day that i enjoyed playing bball happily after so many consect day of trngs..

wed..had a fake trng at vj..went to mac to study wif van..den went for e game against lingyun..yeah alj won..but i screwed up on court..as usual..was disappointed in myself..but my stubborness in mi refuses to cry..its pointless la..i guess..hee n mus thank van..thou she wun see this..but yah..thanks..thanks for constantly seeing my worries n teaching mi wad to do..but overall it was a great day la..had dinner wif mei n yaqi n gen n xiaoqian after that..den took mrt home..all alone..was so tired..

thurs..had trng again..but be4 that went bac to ahs to watch ahs finals..e juniors were doing fine up till 2nd quad..but sumhow had a bad premonition..n yah..they lost in e end..was realli realli sad for them..n sad la..but i guessed they are much sadder than us (snrs) ba..after that watched a little of the guy's match..cchs is realli fast..n our boys had a little hard time catching up la..but at least it was realli nice la..den after that went back to sch for trng..n received e news that e guys lost too..hmm yah..jus hope that both e gals n guys will be able to perform much better during their nationals yeah =D ahs woosh !

fri..which is today..hee had such a sucky start today..cz i fell asleep last nite n din finish my hist essay..not even close to finishing it..so woke up at 5:42am n rushed like siao till 7..but still din finish..n took a cab to sch..n completed e rest of e work during pe..den hmm ended sch le n went bac wif moi..realli mus say sorry to lu..cz i promised to pei her go hse function de..but my class decided to meet at 5:30 for bbq..so can't in e end..i tink i suxz man..feel so bad..yah..anyway e bbq was nice..i tink i starting to like my class more n more le..met jo,xue li and hui hui be4 we went..haha brought em to e wrong side to take 113..thanks to ah sam la..hee jkjk..den we ate n watched brokenback mountain..o mian..e show is erm..nbm..but e scenery that it takes is realli so freaking nice la..hai..how i wish i can go to such places for a trip n get my mind of this hectic life too..hee yah..so watched e movie le..had foto-taking den came bac via 53..nice nite..hee

hmm today i came bac ard 4 n watched super sunday de super mission..o mian..i swear it is one of my most fav. tv shows la..e story abt how ppl meet always amazes mi..e story that they share nv fails to touch my heart..em losing contacts always make mi tink..wad if one day i lose contact wif my friends..who will i wanna find most..haha lots n lots of qn..den today de super mission v v v sad..its abt xu ru yun wanting to find her classmate which she had given a slap cz he say that she was a pig..after that incident she was realli regretful..but nv had e chance to say sorry..so today she wanna find e person n say sorry..but in e end..e person that came out from e door was sum1 that looked completely diff..apart frm e eyes..they were still talking so happily abt e change..den e truth was finally disclosed..e person was actually e guy that they wanted to find e bro..e guy had died in an accident 9 yrs ago..hear the truth le every1 was like so sad la..tears flowed out..mi too la..realli sad..den harlem was saying that e lesson earned = "dun ever hesitate to tell sum1 sumthing..cz u nv noe if u will live past today to face tml ma.."..haiz it realli makes lots of sense man..den was reading tues wif morrie..den it says that morrie had a live funeral de ceremony..cz he went to sum1's funeral n heard all e nice things that ppl said abt e deceased..den he felt a pity cz e deceased will nv be able to listen to e appreciation that others haf towards him le..hee yah..thats what i feel too la..nv hesitate to tell sum1 sumthing..n hence i wanna tell sum ppl sum things..but dere's so many ppl that i wanna tell so many things..so i haf decided to tell my family..thanks for tolerating all my nonsense..realli..my piggy daddy who has been doting on mi since young..my piggy mummy who is becoming more understanding day by day n always dere..my piggy bro for allowing mi to vent my angers n dotes on mi too..i love em so..

haha n yah..today watched channel u de "meng ping tu"..e one e superstars act de..haha quite nice de..i hope i can get to watch e nxt esp ;p

haha hao la..thats abt all for my this wk's update..its been a tiring wk..n i mus admit that i hasn't been strong this wk..i miss so many ppl..i miss so many things..i miss em..i miss jo n xue li too..i miss jus so much..too much to be expressed in words..but can onli be kept in my heart..hee hao la..take gd care every1 !!! byee..

][.FEarless.][
][.missing u all every moment.][
][.hope to meet up wif u all during e hols.][
][.ai e shi te ru forever5.][

][.sumtimes.time realli dun matters.][

][.sumtimes.time realli dun matter.][

hiz bloggy..currently i m eating durians..jus had my dinner..yup i noe its late..11:09pm now..i m getting so fat..but it dun realli matter la..i mean wt can be shed of..but sumtimes disappointment can't..

it was once sumthing that i feared..
now i fear it too..
but for a complete different reason..

i rather fear it for e previous reason than e current one..
e current reason that i fear it realli suxz..
actually its not fear..
but i can't find e right word to describe it..

its affecting my mood..
i hate it..
it was once my reason to smile..
but it has became e reason for my depressing mood..

shugs..

haha hao la..was feeling kind of disappointed n depressed over sumthing that i dun realli deserve to la..wanted to tell sum1 abt it..but it seems like pointless..as in..haha i dun feel e need to..i jus wan this to change..change for e better..changed bac to e past..i pray..

hmm yah..anyway was feeling moodless..so switched on e com n chatted wif auntie joy..haha she reminds mi of so many things..things that were simple n sweet..times when things were jus so simple..not complicated..n maybe a little stupid but yet so nice..made tears welled up in my eyes..but din fall out la..cz these were nice n sweet memories..so mixed wif my disappointed mood earlier..it was jus nice..so jus sum tears that haf gathered..wif a smile while i reminicise these..e simple n happy moments n memories..n e changed world..

haha was jus chatting wif sh that day..den was saying that.."sumtimes u may noe sum1 for yrs n u jus feel that e person dun understand u..whereas sumtimes u jus noe e person for a short while n u can trust e person.."..haha i realli feel so..time dun realli matters at times..like wad aunite joy said..its e click..haha..thinking abt it..i tink its realli true..apart from forever5 which i tink its e time which built up our friendship n making it stronger by yrs la..i tink there r a few ppl that i trust becoz of e "click"..hee..n i had told em that la..cz realli appreciate e understanding..encouragements n friendship they give mi..hee u noe who u r..

hmm yah..so after chatting wif auntie joy..i feel much better la..e disappointment fades a little cz it set mi tinking of sum simple n nice memories n times..yah thou i m still kind of on a depressed mode now..but much much better le =)

haha hao la..shall end here le..gotta go rest le..take gd care every1 ! n stay happy always..rmb : " if there's a reason to be sad..there mus be a reason to be happy too""..n yah..to mi..crying isn't a weakling kind of behaviour..i always believe that it will make one feel better..but after that..mus be strong n move on..hee yah..jus crapping..but thats wad i always feel la..once again..take gd care..n byee..

][.FEarless.][
][.hoping that u will reply.][
][.thankful.][

][.i pray that u all stay.][

][.i pray that u all stay.][

hey bloggy..jus wanna blog sumthing be4 i go out for trng later..hmm bloggy i m realli praying..praying that jo n xueli yongqing and all e 06A13 who are appealing bac to vj can make it n cum bac..

its realli sad when i noe that jo n xueli din make it n went to tj instead..they haf sent in their appeal n i realli hope that they will call mi on mon nite n tell mi e gd news ! we will see each other on tues yeah..

hmm i jus discovered that i had nv blogged much about my 1st 3 mths..its been fun..thou its kinda of stressful at times..but i m realli glad to be in this class n to be part of fat french fries..i will miss fat french fries..its onli after cuming to vj that i start to tok n crap n haf fun wif jo n xue li..hee realli glad to noe em..they haf presented much memorable memories n i hope they will make it bac to giv mi more nicer memories..

its e same for all 06A13..thou i seldom tok to em..but they are realli nice ppl..thanks lots for all e laughters in class n e times we spent together..to all those that is going elsewhere..all e best n thanks for stepping into my life n giving mi these wonderful memories for these months..realli thanks..

to all those that appealed bac..i pray for all..n dun worry ok jo,xueli and yongqing etc..u all will make it back de..waiting to see u all on tues ok !

hao la..i gotta go le..take gd care every1 ! byee..

][.FEarless.][
][.ohsixayeonethree.][

][.mood swings.][

][.mood swings.][

haha hi bloggy..yah..mood swings..but dun worry i not hafing mood swings in e sense of realli mood swings la..but its jus that e day be4 i was realli sad..over sumthings..den ytr i was realli v happy over sumthings too..n now currently..in e early morning of 4/3/06 2:46 am..i m feeling a kind of feeling that i can't define..

actually i had wanted to blog abt my happy n sad day de..but now i feel like bloggin abt sum other things instead..but i also not v sure wad i wanna blog..jus typing n typing..until i set my mind on wad i wan..haha

was toking to sh..den came across ideologies etc..hee..i also not v sure how i shuld express myself la..so maybe i shall try using a not realli "poem" de poem to express myself la =p

][.me.][
cliche as e title might seems , thats me
i m always trying to be positive
but in others eyes i m always feeling negative..
n sumtimes i can't help but agree..

dere are many things in life that i dun realli like..
but i wun say..
cz i tink they will be hurtful..

sum feel that i shuld say wadever i feel..
i thought that i shuld too..
but after much through thinking..
i tink i wuld jus stay e way i m..
cz thats e real mi..

i dun like to hurt others..
cz i hate to be hurt too ( like diao rite..who like to be hurted? =p)

i believe every1 haf their own sets of beliefs n ideology..
thats why i nv tell others that my thinkings are right..
i will jus leave it to e person..
if e person can accept it..
den gd la..
if e person can't..
its also ok la..every1 haf their own rights..
n i respect it..
jus like i hope that others will respect mine too..

haha yah..thats jus a brief outline abt myself..cz sh gave mi "feedback" that i dun realli tok abt my ideologies..haha hmm but i tot i always say a lot de ;p..haha hao la..i shall end here le..cz its kinda of late le..hee anyway shall jus give a brief summary abt these few days so that i can rmb n blog abt it..

-e day be4..realli v sad cz we grow.we changed
-ytr v happy..cz things seems like be4..n we had a great lunch..that made mi full till now..
-trng was fun n kind of slacked...got a ride home frm hui2 listen to her analyise abt sumthings which i tink is realli true..

haha hao la..summary ended..i shall go slp le..or else tml is a super long day..take gd care every1 ! byee..

][.FEarless.][
][.every1 haf their own set of thinkings.][
][.sumtimes i m not wad u tink i m.][

][.tired of everything.leave mi in my own simple world for a while.thanks.][

][.tired of everything.leave mi in my own simple world for a while.thanks.][

i m tired..
tired of everything..
scram scram scram..

did i make a wrong choice..
sumtimes i tink i did..
sumtimes i tink i din..

e feeling suxz when ppl starts toking abt it..
makes mi feel so inferior..
as though i m there to occupy e space that i shuldn't..
taking sumthing that dun belong to mi..

i m starting to feel e stress..
e pace that they are going at is so fast..
i can't catch up..
i m tired..

looking at e files..
i haf so much so much to read..to study..
so much that i dunno how to start..

ppl haf their doubts abt mi..
i jus feel like proving em wrong..
but i nd encouragements..
i nd support..
but every1 ard mi is jus as stressed up..

at least my gd friends are..
i dunno how to tell em..

jus talked to sum1 on e fone jus now..
so many misunderstanding..
so much miscommunications..
so much that we haf no patience for one another..
both parties are at fault..
thats all i can say..
or maybe its onli mi..
maybe..
perhaps..
must be..

leave mi alone for a moment..i feel that i suxz..i always told myself to be positive thou i m always paranoid..but i m tired..mentally..i nd a break n get up to cont e race..defeat every1 who looks down on mi..i hate being looked down..i feel like shouting to these idiots who looked down on mi that they suxz too..but tinking abt it..wads e pt..sum1 told mi to use my own abilities to prove these ppl wrong..n i promise i will..i hope 2 yrs later when i receive my a lvl results like wad e seniors did today..i will be able to stand tall n be proud of myself..

hao la..take gd care every1 ! byee..jia u..be strong..n hmm my com is siao siao le..so tml e repair man gonna cum n take my com away..so may not blog for a few days..take gd care..byee..

ps.happy bday wen n butts ! butts did u change ya no.. or u dao mi..why nv reply ;p hee jkjk

][.FEarless.][
][.give mi e courage to defeat e obstacles.][

][.new insights.][

][.new insights.][

hmm i dunno if there's this word -> insights..neither do i noe if this word do exist..pardon mi for my lousy command of english lang..yah..but jus feel that i feel sumthing new today..as in understand sumthing..sum new thing..

today alj. vs qian xi..lost by 4..acc to yaqi..it was 4 again..same as e 7-11 cup..hmm it wasn't a v well played game ba..but i m realli glad to be in this team..as in..yah..today was a gd start..every1's fighting spirit was at e highest during warm ups etc..its realli a v nice gan jue..we even played "game" slack slack a bit..

hmm wun analysis much of e game le..jus hope that every1 is alright..dun be too sad..n can play to e best for e nxt game..n yah..hope all e injured players r alright too..for eg.bl de eyes..realli scary sia when i see her bled i almost wanna puke..i a bit scared of blood la..so hope she is ok le..

yah..n hmm alj jia u ! jia u alj ! hope e nxt match will be a better one..nope..it shall be..=D *xingxin*

hao la..i wan go slp le..take gd care every1 ! n yah..this blogskin is xueli help mi customize de..hee thanks xue li =D..byee

..i came to understand wad i dun..
..i m starting to understand wad i wan..
..i will work towards it..

][.FEarless.][
][.npo.][
][.tian cai.][

][.we must wan it more than them.][

][.we must wan it more than them.][

today is a so so day..
went sch..lessons..ate at airport wif janice..training..

wad can i say abt today..
inexperienced is all i feel..
maybe lousy is e right word..

e atmosphere wasn't right..
n was nv right for e day..
e stress n tension admist it..
i dunno..
but i somehow felt it..
was it onli imaginations on my part..

is it realli true that e older u grow..
e more complicated things will become..

i dunno..
jus wanna say jia u n relax to all of em..
i noe all of em want to win..
who don't ?..
i wanna win too..(thou i m jus a little nobody)

it isn't jus abt winning it..
it mean lots to me too..like any1 of em..
but i jus wanna say jia u n relax..stay united n i believe that they will n can do it..
cz i m sure that nothing can defeat a united team who believes in emself..n each of their team mates..

jia u ! cum on..dun be stressed..it will hinder ya performance..n i realli pray hard..jia u le..all of ya haf great skills..therefore jus play to e fullest..i haf confidence in you all..

hmm e above msg is for a grp of ppl who i noe will nv cum here n read my blog..but thats wad i wanna tell em..they are realli great players..hence i realli hope that they will play n enjoy e game at e same time..yup..n hmm today toked to mah for a while..kinda of shock that she will ask if i can cope ma..thanks mah..

haha hao la..end here le..wanna go rest le..take gd care every1 ! byee..

][.FEarless.][
][.npo.][

][.the boat might sink even be4 it reaches the shore.][

][.the boat might sink even be4 it reaches the shore.][

today i went back to ahs to get my testi..
i read it..
n i felt so lousy..
not becoz of the testi..
but becoz of wad i was n wad i m now..
i wasn't realli sum1 great in sec sch..
but as i read my testi..
i felt a sense of relief..
a sense of achivements..
but right now..
as i looked at my life..
i can predict wad will be on my testi a yr later..
nothing..
blank..
wad m i now..
everytime i wanna take up a post..wanna try sumthing new..i wuld tink..that day got trng not ah..
n i will decide not to go for it..
i feel so sianz..
sianz not by bball..
but by myself..
i m not catching up wif my hw..
ppl ard mi are like so clever..
n i simply dunno how..
haha like wad i told U that day..
my boat may sink even be4 it reaches the shore..

haha hao la..jus sum grumbling..whining..hee today is overall a not bad day on its surface..quite a slacked day in sch..n becoz i slept for 10 hrs ytr..today i feel so energetic..haha den went 7-11 wif jo,xueli,janice,yongqin n huihui after sch..ate n chatted a bit..den went bac ahs for my testi be4 rushing bac to vj for trng..haha trng was slacked..cz no1 dere..seniors preparing for common test..den hmm wad else..after that they came n we played 5 on 5..together wif mr lim n ms tan..i dun realli run la..n i tink..my stamina suxz now..n mentally kinda of sianz la ;p haha den after that sum cake smashing..cz its mel's bday celebrations..haha den now i m bac home..

haha hao la..shall end here le ! but be4 i end ! heh heh i m v happy..cz xue li helped mi design e blogskin i wan le ! muhaha thank you thank you xue li !!! hee hao la..await my new blogskin ba..hee take gd care every1 ! byee..hehe

][.FEarless.][
][.u gotta work smart.not hard.][

][.finally back home be4 e sun sets.hee.][

][.finally back home be4 e sun sets.hee.][

yeah bloggy !!! i m home now..its 8:10pm..haha i m listening to music diary while blogging now..gan jue hao xing fu =D..hee realli v glad that i m bac home so early today..cz today onli haf 4.8 de run..haha hmm i haf so much to say..so much to blog that i dunno how to start..

haha hao la..like mi jus make sum "notes" here n dere la..

..miss..
-i tink is last last fri or wadever..forever5 went to 230 to play ball(i was late for an hr.psps)..so shuang so shuang..nobody was dere n fungi shot e ball n it stucked dere..haha den we threw wen de shoes bag to get e ball down..if not i die la..is alj de ball leh =p haha den jeff came after a while..we played 3 on 3..haha be4 that was 2 on 3..i miss 230..i miss em..all of a sudden..i feel that we r getting busy n losing e care n concern for each other every now n den again..haha..wen's bday is cuming le..i hope we will be able to get together n plan it soon..haha if wen happen to see this..*ahem* dun nd an shuang la =p

den hmm wad else..sch has past for a few wks le..i m super tired man..everyday cum home i jus slp..go out be4 e sun rises high in e sky n reached home when e sun sets n e sky so dark le..haha lots of notes haven read..shall go do so after i take a rest after blogging ;p

hmm wad else..paiseh this blog is so random..haha my no. of trngs haf cut down by a lot..cz no more nat youth n i too tired to go for both xiao n da dui le..haha bas match has started..n hmm this sun de match shuld be interesting ba..at least thats wad i feel..jia u le alj ! *xingxin*..hope e seniors will be all on their best forms that day..feel so helpless sia..cz i m so lan n inexperienced to help em apart from doing my best during trngs..hee..jia u jia u ! n haha i m starting to enjoy my time training there..n hmm wad else..ytr rushing to trng wif van de time..we chatted a bit..n deres sumthing that she says which i hope that i realli can do so la..n i m confident of doing so..hee

n yah..haha wad else..too much that i wanna blog that i dunno how le..hee

][.changes.][
its realli ironic..
in life..
is it true that we must let go of sumthing once we got sumthing..
is it true that we can nv haf e best of both worlds..
i guess its so ba..
haha..memories will always stay as memories in my heart..
i remembered cuming across these words sumwhere "memories are ones most precious treasure " haha i guess its becoz memories onli belongs to e individual..u can tell others abt bits n pieces of the memories..but they will nv be able to understand it as much as u do..memories shared onli belongs to u..when u r tired..when u feel down..recap bac e memories..
haha thats wad i always do..but sumtimes e more u tink of e memories..e sadder u get..can't understand why it was like that in e past n yet like this now..why haf things changed..dun understand..but all i noe is.."dun cry becoz its over..smile becoz it happened"..hmm i like this quote..but sumtimes its kinda of hard to do so ba..haha psps i always dun do wad i preach de =p muahah

hee hao la bloggy..i tink i stop here le..thoughts jumping here n dere..v messy..haha but dun worry..i m enjoying my days..i m happy wif my life..haha take gd care every1 ! byee..

][.FEarless.][
][.memories.treasured.][

][.thanks to all that cared.][

][.thanks to all that cared.][

y0z bloggy ! yeah i m bac..haha *claps* wel mi bac ba..fe is bac ;p lalala..ok this is so lame..yah..ok..jus wanna blog n thank certain peeps who "helped" mi in "times of darkness"..haha after indulging myself wif endless food n spending $10+++ on food today..+ e countless amt of time that e tears flowed like an uncontrollable spoiled tap..i mus say i m feeling much better le..haha realli..but mus apologise to all for my bad attitude today..i jus dun wanna tok much..cz i m scared that i will tear suddenly..so i appear as v ap la..n during trng..i also can't realli focus..haha so v sorry for this bad attitude..i m jus sorting out my thoughts..

haha maybe its jus like wad auntie joy say..its abt pride ;p haha it jus isn't a nice feeling..but maybe its a blessing in disguise ba =) hee..shall be insane n make auntie joy siao too ;p jkjk..anyway yah..once again sorry for my bad attitude today my friends..hee

ok..my thank u list :
1)cindy coach..haha thou she will nv see this..but..thanks for telling mi not to care abt it..thanks for understanding how i felt..u was e 1st one who gave mi e encouragements..thank u !
2)moi..thanks for lending mi ya towel n listening ear..n trying to lame mi endlessly..haha xie le ;p
3)liying..thanks..hee
4)qiaoxin..yeah we same boat de..thanks for telling mi not to give up..i wun de =)
5)sh..haha thanks..
6)rong..thanks..dun worry i m ok le..hope she is feeling better la..
7)auntie joy..haha xie le auntie joy..like a mama like this ;p..opps is ah ma ;p hope u feeling better too ok =p i m a gd listener too ;p
8)buddy..haha thank u..n sorry for my attitude nowadays ;p cz v tired ;p haha..hope u feeling ok too ok ! jia u jia u !
9)van n lq n nut..for asking mi if i m ok..thou its kinda of casual remark..but i realli appreciate..thanks..
10)jojo..haha thanks for understanding how i felt jo..n all e encouragements ;p
11)every1 that was wif mi today..laming wif mi..eg.jojo.xueli.janice.ame.lu.trina.kaixin.sheryl.xinying.haha n more..realli thanks..

haha hmm i tink i missed out sum..but realli sorry sorry..n i m realli grateful..thank u..*bows*..n of cz my parents la..for telling mi that in life theres definitely sumthings that i will get..n sum that i wun..i jus haf to take things by my stride..haha yup..feeling much better now..thou i guess it will be a hidden wound that is under e bandage..sumthing that cannot be in contact wif water so soon..or else it will hurt..but i guess soon..jus giv it sum time..e wound wuld heal completely de..wif all e thrombokinase etc ;p haha

hao la..shall end here le..tml is another brand new day..n i promise i will be bac e real mi ;p hee thou my leg hurts now ;p wahaha..n o yah..take gd care every1 !!! byee..n happy bday shi hui n sek=p

..if i say it din't hurt..
..i mus be lying..
..jus give it sum time..
..it will recover..
..n i will be stronger..

][.FEarless.][
][.hope to tell u how i feeling.][
][.but i din.][

][.once n again.][

][.once n again.][

once bitten.twice shy
twice bitten.sad for life.

tell me that hardwork do pay off.
tell me that is so.
but i noe the fact is.
hardwork onli pays off at times.

i can't help it.
i dunno wads wrong wif myself.
i jus can't stop e tears from flowing.
i m ok.
at e same time i m not ok.

tell mi.
wad shuld i do.
maybe its jus fate.
maybe its jus the fact that i m not gd enff.

this feeling suckz.
after all e hardwork.
i hurt my right leg.
n now i m bac to square 1.

all e hardwork put in is nothing.
while others were resting.
i was training.
but it still boils down to e fact that i m lousy.

this isn't e 1st time.
this is e 2nd time.

haha paiseh bloggy ! jus trying to whine a little to u..actually today i m realli ok de..jus that hurted my right calf n was kinda of pissed cz it realli hurts..why do this to mi..why let my calf hurt right after my ham string is recovering..haiz..this suckz..but i m still ok..jus stoned while they played..den hmm it was onli when coach cindy came n asked mi if i m ok abt that u18 thing..that i start to feel slightly disappointed..but i told her i was ok..cz i tot i realli was..but after much "thinking"..i discovered that i wasn't..to be frank..i m angry..wif myself..n wif this unfair world..haha o mian..wad e craps i crapping..haiz ignore mi..actualli i m realli ok le..jus wanna type to relax a bit..hee

hao la..take gd care every1 ! byee..n for those who made it..congrats n jia u ok =)

][.FEarless.][
][.i nd ya encouragements.][
][.studies.vj.alj.][

][.yUaN xIaO.][

][.yUaN xIaO.][

yeah today is yuan xiao jie ! n e moon is realli so bright n round ! wahaha..bloggy i noe this is v stupid..but share wif u a secret la..i feel a sense of cannot describe de happiness when i see e big n round moon that is shining on e sky..hee ok..i noe this is stupid..but anyway i m feeling happy now..

hmm actually i started wif kinda of dreading my day..i jus slp n slp till v late..that i missed e time to call sh..psps..cz i realli sianz when i tink of e day that lies ahead of mi..selection..den sph camp briefing..den trng..haha all within a day..

start of day...
went for selection..be4 that met janice..haha realli qiao ok..we going ard e same place n mus meet at e same time..anyway selections is hmm..yah..30+..n they choosing onli 20 ba..haha ok la..i feeling pretty relaxed now..if i nv make it den so be it la ;p..i tink i m not up to e standard yet..hee shall train harder ;p n yah..jus a quote "maybe u haf not met ya coach"..this one is cindy coach say de..hee i tink its quite encouraging ba..n another one from auntie joy "one day u will wear it wif confidence"..

so after that..it ended ard 3..rushed to bathe while ke lian de shao ji waited la..cz i asked her if can wait ma ;p..den to sph via cab..phew its $7.60..quite relieved la..cz i was afraid that it wuld chalk up to $10 +++..but still heart pain la..hmm den went there for sum games..briefing..den catch up wif sum friends..n yah..changed into trng gears n met jasmin via cab..so that can split cost..hee n rushed down to trng..n yah..jia hui jie (e person in charge of us) saw mi in my jersey n she was like..o ..you r from alj ah..

so yah..rushed down in a cab n as expected..they started running le..ok..so i told myself..its jus 30 mins..can de..*when in fact my heart is not thinking in that way la* den every1 run le..onli left coach cindy..so yah..ran wif her..haha..ran a bit le..den she say if can overtake mus overtake..n yah..i tink is realli mUs overtake..so jus overtook..den ran n ran..felt like cramping any min..den dunno how many rounds le..den lqjl ran past mi..i tried to catch up la..den caught up le..jiu jus run n run..ok i mus admit i felt like giving up la..lqjl is realli fast..n i realli mean it..her speed n stamina but i din la..wahaha..i tink if i can always run at that pace jiu hao le..den after ard 3 rounds she completed le..den left mi running by myself again la..so jus run till i completed e 15 round..den coach cindy was asking mi why i slowed down..hee den tell mi mus run like lqjl like this..haha etc etc..den we shot sum balls..formations..den coach cindy left..n we played 3 on 3..den free throws again..haha i guess i noe why i m v happy today ! cz i m starting to enjoy playing bball once again..thanks to e 3 on 3..its jus fun..was grouped wif emily n lqjl..den vs van hui2 n cheryl..den after that coach left..we shot free throws again..den lqjl came out wif sum punishments..haha 5push ups for 1 missed ball..haha ok..so jus shot..n mus thank hui2 for her encouragements while emily tried to distract mi =p..hee den ended ard 8..haha super early..den shot sum balls..n watched e fireworks wif jas n lqjl..yah..fireworks at dere..quite cool la..den wanted to shoot more..but was asked to go eat dinner with family la..cz its yuan xiao ;p hee

so now i m bac here..home sweet home..haha n ya..i m feeling happy..cz tml i promised to go for breakfast wif mummy n didi..den after that go 230 wif forever5 ;p haha..tml seems to be a great day..n i m jus so glad that today isn't the dreaded day that i tot it wuld be..hee..hao la..go slp le.tctc every1 ! byee..n yah..ps. feb so many ppl bday sia..so hmm psps ah..may nd to drag e bday present ;p haha

][.FEarless.][
][.motivation.][

][.A BIG Thanks,][

][.A BIG Thanks.][

after hrs of torturing..
waiting..
sleeping at 9pm waking at 12am..
watching vcds till 3am..
den sleeping till 9am..
n waited e whole morning..
pressing my bloster to my heart..
cz i feeling that my heart going to fall out any moment le la..

i finally received my O levels results..
thou its not v gd..
but i m realli grateful..
thankful..
haha e results is..
hmm all i can say is..e greater hopes n expectations e more disappointing it is.. hee jkjk..

hao la..need to thank a list of ppl..so pls dun mind if i missed out any..hee

1) Piggy daddy + mummy : haha thanks lots for all their support n encouragements n nagging these yrs..
2)Gan Die n Gan ma : thanks lots for everything too
3)My teachers : to all my teachers ! realli a big thank you for all ya guidance n help esp during my o lvl period =)
4)My friends : thanks lots for asking mi to press on n all ya encouragements !
5)Lingqin jl : thanks lots for all e sunday afternoons spent in mac trying to help mi as much as u can..despite ya busy schedules..realli thanks lots..but hai..i still did badly..realli sorry..but realli thanks ! hee thank you..
6)van: thanks..hee
7) to every1 : thanks lots every1 ! hee

haha hao la..i shall end here le..cz mummy chatting wif mi..so nt realli can blog la ;p hee tc every1 ! tml is a long day ahead ;p haha tctc every1 ! byee

][.FEarless.][
][.thank u.][

][.motivation.][

][.motivation.][

ytr i was feeling grouchy..
today i m feeling normal..

when one is tired..
a pat on e back..
a word of encouragement..
a simple eye contact is all one nd..

today was another long n tiring day..
got "scolded" for numerous times..
felt sianz..
but e encouragements made mi feel like doing better..

i noe i m lousy..
but i m willing to improve..
as long as u give mi a chance n guide mi..

i thought that u dun care..
but it seems like u do..
thank you..
i m realli grateful for that..

yeah tml is a rest day !..
this wk seems so long..
i jus can't wait for fri..
get everything over n done wif..

nowadays i m leaving everything to fate..
i m pushing myself to e max..
cz who noes what will happen after fri..
will my life be e same ?..
i realli dunno..

anyway take gd care every1 ! tctc..byee..

][.FEarless.][
][.2 more days.][
][.if i m to die tml.rmb mi as i m today.=).][

][.haiz.][

][.haiz.][

feeling super hmm..down ?..
i dunno..jus wanna apologise to all today..due to my bad attitude la..esp during trng..i m sick n tired of everything..can't e days jus past faster..i m tired la..i jus can't wait for fri to cum..get my results n decide on my "future"..its better than hanging there..not knowing where u heading to..agrh ! im tired of it..

apart from waiting for e results on fri..i m feeling sick of bball..haiz..or rather wif myself..i dunno wad i wan man..haiz..jus giv mi my results 1st..die or survive..quick let mi noe..

sorry to all..this is jus a bloggy for mi to vent my frustration..i m sianz..agrh !!!!!!!!!! i zkucs ! agrh !!!! hao la..go le..tctc every1 ! byee..

][.FEarless.][
][.3 more days.][
][.how much i wanna tell u.yet i noe u wun reply.][

][.backview.][

][.backview.][

hey bloggy..today i got so much so much to blog..cz e past few days..my life was so "colourful"..hee but i jus discovered that i haven do my work yet..*die*..but i still feel like blogging 1st..yup..

][.friday.reunion steamboat.n great tok.][
haha fri was supposed to be home by 3 cz i promise forever5 that i will be home by that time to prepare for our steamboat dinner..but by a twist of fate..i ended up at pp wif rong ame n sh..haha had a great tok..hmm i mean yah..i throw out all my "bitter tea" n haf a bit of change in perspectives regarding certain things la..den pia cab home..reached ard 6 plus..wen n jing already at my hse for dunno how long le la..paiseh2..hee glad to see em..den we played dai dee while waiting for fungi n moi..den steamboat..n haha byee..had a great chat wif mummy regarding e same things again..den slept kinda of late..but i haf a nice slp..cz i had a nice day..

][.sat.trng n sas.][
quite a bad day..started trng wif all e sprints..o mian..i can tell u that i m running out of lactic acid la..legs were wobbling..n i realli haf no speed..den after that all those drills..n as usual..i keep on travelling..i realli suxz man..felt so sucky after that..no speed no center move..den went home rest for 10mins..bathe eat chiong out to take 969 wif moi..den woodlands meet e others to go for e sas match..be4 e match had some trng..super tired..i was "dying" le la..n i suckz completely totally for e match..i mean realli..i wonder how many lan di(s) haf i missed la..n so many things that i shuld nt do n yet i did..i realli felt so angry wif myself..realli..n also bei coach scold quite a lot la..haiz..came home n chatted till 3plus be4 i slp..at least it ended not that bad la..

][.sun.trng.trng.][
woke up at 8:10 this morning..was chiong-ing like crazy..luckily i wasn't realli late for trng..sianz..onli 10 ppl appeared..while ytr match jiu 20+++ today trng jiu so little onli..n we had to run for 20 mins..ran 40++ ard e bball court..did sum shootings..den did e formation..i was on my verge of tears le la..i can realli feel my muscles tearing n protesting to mi that they wanna break down le..under e hot sun..den keep on bei scold again..realli v tired..so trng ended ard 1..chiong-ed home..reached ard 1plus 2..took a 30 mins rest..in fact is not rest la..jus nuah-ing dere..den went to bathe be4 i chiong to gan ma's hse for reunion lunch..reached dere ard 3..ate hurriedly..den chiong for trng at 3:30..was slightly late..but onli van n yaqi reached le.."last trng wif da dui"..hmm so onli 6 ppl at 1st..van,yaqi,cindy coach,lqjl,daisy n me la..den cindy coach was like..go run 20 mins..i was jus nuah-ing or rather stoning on e bench..i realli dun wanna run le..i can feel my muscles surrendering..n my tears at e corner of my eyes..i held em bac la..or else coach sure think i crazy de..luckily we ran 3 by 3..yaqi n van n me..all agreed to slow down to jog jiu hao..cz realli tired..so we ran e park 8 rounds..den came bac do sum shooting while e rest went to run..den after they came bac..coach asked mi to go e other side to tou lan di..o mian..its so tiring..i mean haiz..suan le..i was jus trying to hang on..realli..cz i knew i shuld nt missed all those lan di(s)..den i take it as a learning session la..but realli felt so tired..n jus feel like falling onto e ground..den after that jas n yun cum..den formations after formations..den i keep on make mistakes..n cz there's onli lqjl n mi as centers..din get any rest..n when trng finally ended..i was so happy..n so tired..den went coach cindy hse to bathe be4 going to manager steven de hse..had steamboat..den play 21dian..den rao yu sheng..hee quite fun la..actually is jus like last yr..den hmm reached home ard 11:30..n yah..i m feeling so tired nw..super..duper..i doubt i will do my hw le..jus feel like falling onto my bed..nitey n goodbye my tiring n torturing day..

][.current feelings.][
perplexed once again..
i was happy when i knew abt that..
but now i m feeling perplexed..
both haf its own "charms" that is attracting mi towards it..
haiz..shall jus leave it to fate la..
i m so tired..

byee every1 ! nitey + tc..

][.FEarless.][
][.be strong.][
][.i wonder how long more i can be.][

][.beautiful stars.][

][.beautiful stars.][

hey bloggy..psps din blog ytr..wanted to..but was too tired..had cross-country ytr..kinda of disappointing..but its ok la..cz bball gals team1 got 1st =D realli glad..but realli v sorry to fungi..i "broke" our promise..but i dare to say..i realli tried my best..but i jus nv seem to be able to do it..n when i ran..n saw e crowd infront..my heart realli sank..realli..i tried to overtake..but there's no space in front..shugs..e feeling suckz..i swear..n deres a lesson learnt..squeeze to e front of e starting line be4 everything start..n chiong all ya way..dao hou mian cai lac a bit..n all i wanna tell fungi is..i can't but u can..jia u ! i m awaiting ya gd news ok..but no stress la..realli..=)

hee so after cross-country ytr..went for swensense wif e team be4 i went to watch i not stupid too wif 1/2 e team..e other half went for fearless..realli touching man..i mean i not stupid too..n gen got act wow ! hee kinda of stunned when i saw her..hee but its nice..nice show la..den after e movie..i cont to stay at ps..for my class jms..junior meet senior..n once again..we went swensese..o mian..spent so much ytr..my pocket burn one big hole le la..sianz..den reached home ard 10?..hee that ended my day..n yah..came to noe of sumthing ytr..but i m perplexed after that..mixture of happiness n lost..haha i dunno..its sumthing that words wun be able to explain..n yah ! there's sumthing i mus mention !!! xinying bought mi "wu gui"..hee e exact same pattern de..*touched*..thanks thanks ! hee i will treasure this wu gui n make sure it wun suffer e same fate as e one be4 le..*mo ai 1 min for my previous n one n onli wu gui*

so today is jus another norm day..was so tired when i woke up in e morning..n e tired feeling lasted e whole day..came home n saw mummy hurted her hand..cz e glass cut her..stupid glass..so helped out mummy a little be4 going out again..n now here i m home sweet home..awaiting tml..awaiting our reunion dinner..mummy haf helped mi buy e food le ! realli v grateful n thankful..but she hurted her hand..so can't cook curry tml..but i realli hope to make it a wonderful dinner for all tml =)..hee n mus thank mummy..hope tml everything will go smoothly la..

n yah..to npo..u haf my promise..dun worry..i wun..unless its v cute =p hee..hao la..shall end here le..kinda of tired..wanted to read thru my notes n pack my file..but i guess i jus haf to leave all this for tml la..hee n yeah ! wen kinda of promise to help mi queue for music diary3 de cd le !!! muhaha *muackz wen*..hee v happy..byee every1..tc always..

][.my current world.][
everything seems to be in place..
everything seems perfect..
but i m feeling perplexed..
i can't explain how i m feeling..
all i long for is to lay on e ground n enjoy e beauty of e stars above me..
but i m still thankful..
for everything heaven haf arranged for mi..
thanks..

][.FEarless.][
][.i promise.][
][.wo de xin shi.sui neng zhi.][
][.zhi neng jian qiang de yi yi xiao mian dui.][
][.ba xin zhong de fan nao wang xin ni fang.][

][.happy day.=D.][

][.happy day.=D.][

y0z bloggy !!! hee today i haf a happy day =D hee..realli v happy..hmm actually i woke up in e morning n i tot its kinda of a screwed day..cz wanted to go mrs goh de hse wif council de..but all those that i m better wif nv go..so i jiu nv go also la..cz i also got og outing ah..den who noes..og outing tot that i can't make it apart for dinner..so they din tell mi e afternoon plan..so i m like left wif a whole day till evening..den fungi din reply mi if we going for movie ma..so i m like sad..its like..every1 ask u wan this n that ma..den in e end..all fang ya ge zhi together..haha..

luckily i made a choice..n thats to call jing ;p heh heh right choice ok..so we decided to go watch movie de time all this..den jing tell fungi n i tell moi..i tried to call wen..but she haven cum bac yet ba..hee we wanted to watch huo yuan jia aka fearless de..cz i like e eng name la..but hee we din in e end..cz i decided to settle for sumthing funny n they v nice de rang mi =D xie le ! hee so i was late..sorry2..moi was later ;p haha jkjk..so be4 moi cum..we went to CS de vcd shop..den fungi recalled that TM basement got 1 also ;p haha so there is this little kiddy thingy.."u nv say wad..n u nv ask wad"..haha den moi came..n we wanted to fool her by taking e escaltor down while she goes up..but she saw us..hee so din la..den went ntuc..bought our stuffs..n they stuffed everything into a bag..n yah..mine..but nbm..hee

den we went for e movie..i also nt sure e name la..its meet dick n dunno wad la..kinda of funny la e movie..but not realli worth ya $9.50 ;p hee jkjk..den after that moi went off to bai nian..while jing fungi n mi decided to go airport ;p haha actually is mi la..cz my og going there ma..so jiu ask em pei mi go for dinner..haha but heres e story ;p

][.circle2.][
so we left TM..n decided to take 27..so we saw e 27 cuming n we were so happy..we jus hoped on ! haha so..u shuld be able to guess wads nxt ba..we din reach e airport..we went to sengkang ! haha n we were trying to squeeze into e seat..3 person to 2 seats..like when we were young n going on excursion..haha its super squeezy la..cz da jia dou zhang da le..kinda of dumb..but i enjoyed it la..den jing n fungi discovered it was e wrong way..den jing was saying she will kill mi if e bus is to sengkang..haha den e guy infront of us turned n say..yup..this bus is to sengkang..u all better alight be4 eTPE..haha but be4 we culd..e bus went to TPE n haha dere we r at sengkang ;p n we ;pass by a bigbig drain..which i wuld call it river ;p hee v smelly..but i managed to capture a nice pic of it..so we alight at e 1st stop at sengkang n took 27 bac to tamp be4 we go to e airport ;p hee n when we alighted..e guy was laughing at us..but nbm..we finally reached e airport wif e 27..hee sorry la jing n fungi..

at e airport..we had bk at t2..n i was eating like a glutton..for super long..n jing was hinting mi to da bao ;p but i dun wan la..den after that we went to buy candies ;p hee actually is fungi wanna buy e choc mashmallow de..but out of stock..so we ended up buying a ring sweet wif light de..hee i bought blue..jing bought green n fungi bought red..den we took lots of pics wif it..hehe..den went swensense to find my og..they finished their meal le..den i jus sat ard for a while n pass em e jts de money be4 leaving wif fungi n jing..hee but j-wei helped us take a pic cz he saw us trying to take 1 by ourself ;p xie le j-wei..hee so home sweet home..we took 53 home..n we decided to haf steam boat on fri..haha n i told mummy le..she agreed..she even volunteer to cook curry ! haha so happy n look forward to fri..hee wads more is..fri no trng =D haha yeah..

den walked home that time chatted wif fungi..i m realli v happy today..realli..hee n fungi..i hope i can blog tml to tell u that.."if i can..u can"..

haha hao la bloggy..this yr de new yr not too bad la..gathering wif my relatives was kinda of nice..n hmm together get to go out wif forever5..wad more can i ask..jus that wen nt bac from m'sia yet..so..but nbm..can see her on fri le ah..hee thanks heaven..i m grateful..hee n yah..i found another nice show to watch le..hee shall blog abt it nxt time..haha

hao la..byee bloggy..i wan go find things abt that show den go slp at 1am le..hee byee every1 ! tctc !

][.FEarless.][
][.thank u.][
][.onli when i m wif u all.][